STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Banta: Sante tera restaurant kaisa Chal raha hai?
Santa: Koi Khas nahi.
Banta: Vaise main do bar tere restaurant Aaya, Par wahan pe tala laga hua tha.
Santa : yaar tu lunch ya dinner ke time Aaya hoga.. Uss time humlog khana khane Ghar jate hai
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Doctor: Tumhare Kaan Kaise Jale?
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Santa: Main Kameez Istari Kar Raha
Tha, Ke Phone
Aa Gaya.
Maine Jaldi mein Phone Ki Jagah
Istari Kaan Mai Laga Li
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Doctor: To Doosra Kaan Kaise Jala?
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Santa: Ab Ambulance Ko Bhi Phone
Karna Tha Na.
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Santa Ne Ghar Ke Uper Wale Hisse Mein Paint Kiya Aur Neeche Wale Hisse Mein Likh Diya
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“Same As Above
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Ek Baar Santa Ke Gaanv Mein Ek Minister Aya Hua Thha
Logo Ne Apne Gaanv Ko Sudhaarne Ke Liye Kayi Cheezo Ko Maang Ki
Santa Bhi Bola: “Hume Apne Gaanv Mein Pul Chahiye”
Minister Hairan Hote Hue: “Par Tumhare Gaanv Mein To Koi Nadi Hi Nahi Hai”
Santa: “To Fir Hume Nadi Bhi Chahiye“
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Mujrewaali:
Hamne aapko khus kiya ab aap humko khus kar do...
Santa emotional ho gaya aur bola,
Acha behen...ab tu baith main nachta hun.. :-d
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A Khubsoorat Si Ladki Santa Ki Garment Shop Par Gayi Aur Boli: “Mujhe Underwear Dikhao”
Santa Sharmate Hue: “Aaj Pehan Ke Nahi Aya“
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संता :-- कौन सी कास्ट ( जाति ) के लोग अच्छे नागरिक होते हैं ?
बंता :-- बनिए ……!
संता :-- वो कैसे..?..
बंता :-- हर जगह लिखा होता है, देश के अच्छे नागरिक "बनिए" ! देशभक्त "बनिए"
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संता बड़ी देर से अपने कमरे में कुछ ढूंढ़ रहा था,
परेशान होकर उसकी पत्नी जीतो बोली
जीतो-तुम इतनी देर से क्या ढूंढ़ रहे हो?
संता- हिडन कैमरा!
जीतो- तुम्हें ऐसा क्यों लगा इस कमरे में हिडन कैमरा लगा है?
संता- अगर यहां हिडन कैमरा नहीं लगा होता तो टी.वी. में आ रहे इस आदमी को
कैसे पता होता कि हम स्टार प्लस देख रहे हैं, बार-बार यह आप देख रहे हैं स्टार
प्लस क्यों बोल रहा है?
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Santa USA mein tha.
1 building mein aag lag gayi.
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Santa Fire Brigade se-Tum logo
ko Niche fenko main Catch karunga.
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Pehle 1 Ladka aaya phir ladki phir
aadmi phir aurat.
Santa ne sab ko pakad liya.
Phir
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1 negro(black person) aaya to
Santa ne chhod diya aur
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bola:
Abey salo jo jal gye hai wo to mat
fenko…!!
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Santa roti ka 1 tukda khud kha raha tha aur 1 pass baithi murgi ko khila raha tha...
Banta: "Ye kya kar raha hai?"
Santa- "Chicken ke sath roti kha raha hu.
Shravan chal rahe hain na.
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Santa -Jab bhi wife mera photo apne mbl se click karti hai mujhe bahut dar lagta hai........
Saala aaj kal OLX aur quikr ki advertise bahut aati hai na
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santa- hm pati-patni tamil sekhna chahte hai..
banta- woh kyu?
santa- hmne ek tamil bacha goud liya hai. hm sochte hai jab wo bolne lage ushse pehle hm tamil sekh le,,
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santa- ap to hindi mai kafi tej hai, mujhe ye bataeye dwand kya hota hai?
banta- dwand aise jode ko kehte hai jishme hamesha virodh rehta hai, jaise- sukh -dukh, sardi-garmi. santa- pati-patni...
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santa- apki patni kyu bhag gayi?
banta- pata nhi! mai bathroom mai nahane gaya aur wo bhag gayi..
santa- lagta hai aisa mauke k liye bechri salo intzar krti rahi.....
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santa- mai to samjhta tha ki ap bade sarif aadmi hai..
banta- mai bhi apko sarif samjhta tha..
santa- ap to thik samjhe the, mai hi galat samjha tha..
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banta- pehle to ap logo ko bahut haste the lakin ab kya ho gaya?
santa- meri shadi ho gayi....
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santa- apk ghar mai kaun kaun rehta hai?
banta- mai meri patni,meri saas, meri 7 saliya.
santa- phir to ap usi waqt muh kholte honge jab jamahi leni ho ya chik marni ho..
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banta- ye letter tm kise likh rahe ho? santa- khud ko. banta- ishme kya likha hai?
santa- malum nhi... santa- kyu? banta- abhi mujhe mili kaha hai...
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banta- ap kya kr rahe ho? santa- ish baby ki awaj record kr raha hu.. banta- wo kyu?
santa- wo jb bada ho jayega ,ushse ishka matlab puchunga..
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banta- gajni mai amir ne itni solid body kaise banaye hogi?
santa- jab wo gym se wapas ata tha to 15 mint k baad bhul jata tha aur phir waps gym chala jata tha..
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banta- khusiya kya hoti hai?
santa- pata nhi,meri to kaam age mai hi shadi hogayi thi..
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Snta- Ladki ko prapose karne ki sabse safe jagah konsi he?
Banta- Mandir S-Mandir kyu? B-Qki waha ladkiyo k pairo me CHAPPAL nai hoti.
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Santa: Yaar Tu Itna Bada Ho Gaya Aur Phir Bhi Abhi Tak Tere Ko
Dadhi- Mooch Nahi Aayi?
Banta :Yaar Main Bilkul Apni Maa Par Gaya Hoon
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Santa Banta Watching Match Dhoni Ne 6 Mara
Santa- Dekh Dekh, GOAL Hua Banta- Abe,
Tu Pagal Hi Rahega ....GOAL Isme Nahi CRICKET Me Hota H
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Teacher: Cow Hamari Mata hai.(School k bahar 1 Cow road pe ghum rhi thi)
Santa: Sir..Sir.. Baahar Aapki Mummy Awara "saando" k sath Ghoom Rahi hai
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Sardar: Yaar ye "SENT MESSAGE" Kya hota he?
2nd sardar: Ghochu,
Saale, Bevkuf, Tune Hi Srdaro Ka Nam Kharab Kia He.
Sent Message Matlab "Khushbu Wala Message..
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Santa: whats diffrence between Seniors & Juniors?
Banta: samundra k najdik rehte wo seniors (sea+nears)
&
jo Zoo k najdik rehte wo Juniors (Zoo+nears)
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Santa Kadi-Chaawal Kha Raha Tha.
Khate-Khate Ek MAKKHI khaane pe Baithne Lagi.
SANTA Use Udate Hue Bola- Chal Pagli, Ye Wo Nahi Hai Jo Tu Samajh Rahi Hai..!
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Santa ne bhagte huye Bus pakdi aur Driver se puchha.
Bus teri Maa lagti he?
Nahi.
Behen?
Nahi.
Biwi?
Nahi.
To kamine "PAKDNE" kyo nhi deta..
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Santa: Mujhe Shadi Me BMW Mili He.
Banta: Pr Tumhare Pass To Koi Car Nahi He!
Santa: Abye Ghadhe,
BMW Ka Matlab
Bahut Motti Wife
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Santa : Soch Raha Hu Ki USA Ghumaun,
Kitna Paisa Lagega?
Banta : Kuch B Nahi
Santa : Kaise?
Banta : Sochne K Liye Paise Nahi Lagte
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Santa’s wife dies. He is calm, but his wife’s lover is crying furiously…
Finally, santa consoles him: Don’t worry buddy, I will marry again.
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Judge: Y U’ve stolen money 4m dis man?
Sardar: My lord I’ve nt stolen money. He jst gave it 2 me
Judge: Whn He gave U money ?
Sardar: Whn I showd him gun
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History teacher asked Santa: Name kalidas’s brother who was a shoemaker.
Santa: Adidas
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Salesman-Which Soap U Use?
Santa-BABA’S Soap,BABA’S Paste,BABA’S Brush.
Salesman-Is BABA’S
An INTERNATIONAL Company?
SAnta: Baba Is My Room Mate
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SANTA Ghar Ka Darwaza Ukhaad Ke Kandhe Pe Rakh Ke Ja Raha Tha.
Kisi Ne Puchha: Oye Kahan Ja Rahe Ho?
SANTA:Chabi kho gyi h Taala Khulwanay ja rha hun..........
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Santa: Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai, Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai.
Banta: Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Maalik Ka, Hum To Kirayedar Hain..
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Santa: I’ve Been Sending E-mails To William Shakespare…
Banta: William Shakespare Is Dead, Stupid…
Santa: No Wonder He Hasn’t Replied As Well…
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Sardar ko sapne me ek ladki ne chappal mari,
2 din tak sardar apne bank nahi gaya,
Qnki bank me likha tha..
“hum aapke sapne ko hakikat me badalte hain”
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Santa apni grlfrnd k saath 1st date pe : Ye meri pehli date hai darling agr koi galti ya kami reh jaye toh chhota bhai samajh k maaf kr dena.
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Santa Sharab Pikar
Sadhu Se Takra Gya
Sadhu Gusse Me- Aye Murkh
Me Tujhe SHRAAP Deta Hu
Santa-Rukiye Maharaj
Me Glas Leke Ata hu
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Banta2santa:tu ye muhme buk leker,
kya kar raha hai?
santa:oh yaar dostone mujhe,
facebook ka id banane ko kaha hai.
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Ek bhikhari road pe chilla rha tha- alah ke nam par ek rupaya de de.
Santa 100ka note dikhate huye bola 50rupya hai kya?
Bikhari excited ho ke- ha hai.
Santa to pahle use kharch kar na
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Santa fell in love.
Banta: dude wat did u see in her..?
Santa: her left eye is so beautiful that
even her right eye was looking at it!
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Jaj to Santa--tumhe phasi di ja rahi hai,
bolo tuhari antim echchha kya hai,
Santa-Jaj saheb,
mere badle aap hi latak jaiye!!
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santa- 1 chor ne mujhe chaku dikha k lut liya,
banta- tera pas to hamesha gun hoti hai,
santa- ha 2 lakh ki hai
mene chupali thi vrna harami vo b le jate.
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Santa standing on platform,
studdenly jumps or railway track.
man- marega kya?
santa- saale marega to tu,
suna nahi train platform pe aa rahi h.
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SANTA Apni Girlfriend K Sath 1st
Date Pe:
"Ye Meri Pehli Date Hy Darling"
Agar Koi Glti Ya Kami Reh Jaye To.
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Chota Bhai Samaj Kr Maaf Kr Dena.
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Santa Walking On Road.
Samne Gobar Pada Tha!
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Santa Ne Jhuk Kr Ungli Dal Kr Taste Kia Aur Bola
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Oh! Ye To Gobar h,Shukr h Mera Pair Nai Pada
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Santa Cricket Khel Kar Aaya.
Banta: Kitne Run Banaye?
Santa: Century Hone Me 99 Run Baki
The Or mai Out Ho Gaya.
Banta: Shit Yaar so close!
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