STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
Banta: Indian presence in this Olympics was not felt at all.
Santa Singh: No, there was one person from India who was present in every match of Olympics.
Banta: Who ?
Santa Singh: Commentator Charu Sharma.
58 
35 Years Ki Aurat Balcony Se Niche Kachre Ke Dabbay Mein Ja Giri.
Santa Ja Raha Tha, Dekh Ke Bola: Pati, Kafi Shokeen Lagta Hai, Warna Ye Abhi 8, 10 Saal Or Chal Sakti Thi.
38
Santa Was Awarded 2010 Nobel Prize For His New Theory Of Motion Which States.
Loose Motion Can Never Be Done In Slow Motion.
40
Santa ne PCO pe jate hi PCO wale ko 2 thappad laga diye.
Socho kyon?
Because PCO ke bahar likha tha, dial karne se pahle 2 lagaye.
53
Sardar ne daru pi ke apne apko aaine main dekha or bola isko to kahin dekha hai.
Oye yaad aaya ye to wahi haramkhor h,
Jo shadi k album me meri biwi k sath tha.
45
Sadhu: Bachcha teri biwi ko chuddail chipak gayee hai Upaaye karvaao.
Banta: Upayaye? Baba, agar do behenein gale mil rahi hain to is mein harz hi kya hai?
60
Santa: Yaar banta I am going ka matlab kya hota hai?
Banta: Main ja raha hoon.
Santa: Abe aise kaise jaayega saala 20 log se puchh chuka hun, sab chale gaye answer bata ke jaa.
49
Jailor: Tum kis Jurm Me Aye Ho?
Sants: Kuch Khas Bat Nahi, Bharat Sarkar Se Competition Ho Gaya Tha
Jilor: Kis Bat Ka?
Santa: Note Chhapne ka
47
Santa : Matlbi Dost Se Bach Kar Raho.
Banta : Magar Matlbe Dost Ka Pta Kaise Chalega.
Santa Simple,Sare Dosto Ko Msg Karo jo Reply Na De Samjah Lo Wo Hi Matlbi Hai
39
A man to Santa: Aao ji chess khelein.
Santa: Tu chal mein sports shoes pehen kar aaya.
58
Santa Apne Dost Se: Aaj Ghar Jate Hi Biwi Ki Chaddi Utarunga.
Dost: Aaj Bade Mood Mein Lagte Ho?
Santa: Ghanta, Bahut Tight Hai Yaar, Subah Galti Se Biwi Ki Pehan Li Thi.
52
Santa aur banta k bich mai fight ho rahi thi.
Banta: Saale mai tere kapde phaad k tujhe naanga kar doonga.
Santa: Dekh serious ladai mai romantic baat mat kar.
51
Grammar Teacher Pada Rahi Thhi Usne Santa Se Puchha: Sunil Daaru Nahi Peeta Hai,
Is Sentence Main Sunil Kya Hai?
Santa: Madam Ji Sunil Ch_t_ya Hai.
57
Banta Apni Job Ke Liye Ek Company Mein Interview Dene Gaya.
Interviewer Ne Banta Se Puchha: Landline Aur Cellphone Mein Kya Farak Hai?
Intelligent Answer By Banta: Landline Mein Number Ungliyon Se Dial Karna Padta Hai Aur Cellphone Mein Anguthe.
42
Santa to Shopkeeper: Gora Karn Wali Creme Haigi, Tere Kol,
Shopkeeper: Haan Hai.
Santa: Fer Saale Launda Kyun Ni, Teri Sakal Dekh Ke Main Roz Dar Janda Haan.
55
Santa: jab main mar jaon to samne wali family ko zaroor bulana.
Banta: kyun?
Santa: yaar unke ghar ki ladies murde se lipat lipat kar roti hain.
356
Santa: jab main mar jaon to samne wali family ko zaroor bulana.
Banta: kyun?
Santa: yaar unke ghar ki ladies murde se lipat lipat kar roti hain.
356
Santa: Yaar Uth Bhukamp Aa Raha Hai, Saara Ghar Hil Raha Hai.
Banta: Soja-Soja Ghar Girega To Makaan Maalik Ka, Hum To Kirayedar Hain..
871
Maths Teacher To Santa: If You Had 1000Rs in Your Pocket,
And 1000Rs In Other Pocket, What would u think ?
Santa:Yeh pant kis ki hai?
50
SANTA: Bhiga sa lagta h Alam mujhe,
Bhigi si lagti h subah mujhe,
Bhiga lag raha h sara jaha mujhe.
BANTA: Uth sale,bistar pr susu kr dia h tune.
52
Santa Ne Beti K Room Me Cigratte Dekhi,
Oh God, She Smokes.
Wisky Dekhi, Oh God, She Drinks.
Fr Ldke Ko Dekha,
Thnx God,
Ye Sb Iska ha.
55
Santa mobile recharge karwane gaya.
Dukandar: Kitne kaa?
Santa: 10 ka kar do.
Dukandar: 7 rs ka talktime milega.
Santa: Koi baat nahi, 3 rs ki namkin de do.
53
Santa: Kal meri shadi hai aur ladki walo ne kam log bulaye hai.
Banta: To isme prob kya hai?
Santa: Pata nhi papa mujhe le jaynge ya nhi.
48
Santa traveling 1st time in plane going to BOMBAY,
while landing, he shouted : "BOMBAY-BOMBAY",
air hostess : " B-silent please ",
santa said : " OMBAY - OMBAY...
811
Teacher : santa, why are you doing your math multiplication on the floor?
Santa : You told me to do it without using tables.
903
Santa: Aaj mane basanti ko nhate hue dekha.
Banta: Mai tera khun pi jaunga.
Santa: Mai nha rha tha aur wo ja rhi thi.
39
Maths teacher to Santa: How much is 5 autorickshaws plus 5 autorickshaws?
Santa: One Volkswagen.
Teacher: Errr,HOW ?
Santa: Very simple,lemme explain.
5 auto + 5 auto = Das Auto = Das Auto = Volkswagen.
The teacher fainted.
846
Santa Banta ke ghar gaya.
Wahaa Banta ki biwi ko dekh kar bola.
Santa: Teri aur Bhabhi ki jodi to Ram-Sita ki jodi hai.
Banta bola: Kahaa yaar Na to yeh dharti mein samaati hai,
Na hi ise koi rawan le jaata hai.
59
Santa : Football Male Hai Ya Female ??
Banta : Aareeee Jiske Piche 11+11=22 Ladke Bhag Rahe Ho,
Vo Female Hi Hogi Na.
713
Biwi raat me kapde utrte hue...
tirchi nazar se Santa ki traf dekte hue boli:
Pata he na kya karna hai..?
Santa: teri aisi ki taisi,,,
Me itni rat ko kpde nahi dhounga..!
761
Banta Santa se: Biwi se Jhagda Solve hua kya?
Santa: Wo to hona hi tha Ghutno pe Chal k,
Aayi thi Mere Paas.
Banta: Fir kya hua wo Kya Boli?
Santa:Boli Palang k,
Neeche se Nikal Aao Ab Nahi Maarungi.
44
Santa everest pr gya
waha 1 baba pahle se baitha tambaku ragad raha tha
santa-baba ye kya hai
baba-masala
Santa- Oh O to Evrest Masala ap hi bnate ho
873
Santa: Aaj TV pe 30 feet ka saap dikhane wale h.
Banta: Acha
Par mai nhi dekh pawunga.
Santa: kyu?
Banta: Mera TV to 21 inch ka hi hai.
38
Santa:Yaar tune apni Biwi ko Talak kyu diya?
Sardar:Yaar wo badi character less thi.Shaadi mujhse ki aur Baccha Bhagwan se mangti thi
808
संता : एक बार मेरे ऊपर से स्कूटर निकल गया , पर फिर भी मुझे कुछ नहीं हुआ .
बंता : यह तो कुछ भी नहीं … एक बार मेरे ऊपर से हवाईजहाज निकल गया, मैं फिर भी बच गया .
971
Santa ne Dariya me dubte huye 1 aadmi
ko bachaya or Thodi Der Baad Dobara Phenk diya
Banta- Q?
Santa-Kahawat h yar NEKI Kar, Dariya Me Daal.
898
Santa dials a number
a Girl answered….
Santa : Hello… kaun?
Girl: Main Seeta…
Santa : O teri!!, yeh to ayodhya lag gaya
435
Doctor: I am sorry.
Opration ke waqt Rubber ke Gloves
Aapke pet me reh gaye.
dobara opration karna hoga.
Santa: Abey, pagal hai kya?
Ye le 20 rupaye.. naya le le..
501
Santa ko 2 bomb mile.
Santa: Chal police ko de ke aate he.
Banta: Agar koi bomb raste me phat gaya to?
Santa: Jhoot bol denge ki 1 hi mila tha.
378
Santa Flight Mein Pilot Ke Headphones Chheen Ne Ki Koshish Kar Raha Tha. Pilot Hairani Se: Ye Kya Kar Rahe Hai, Sir? Santa: BC Ticket Hum Le, Aur Gaane Tum Suno, Chal Idhar De.
623
Mujrewaali: Hamne aapko khus kiya ab aap humko khus kar do. Santa emotional ho gaya aur bola, Acha behen, ab tu baith main nachta hun.
752
Santa Dukhi Tha Kisi Ne Pucha: Kyu Tension Me Ho? Santa: Yaar Ek Dost Ko plastic Surgery ke Liye 2 Lakh Diye, Ab Saale Ko Pehchan Nahi pa raha hu..
968
A man to Santa: Your friend is kissing your wife in your home. Santa rushes home and came back within half an hour and slapped the man and said:‘He’s not my friend.’
545
Police: Oye, tune Papita Bechne wali ko kiss kyon kiya?? Santa: Sir, main bhi kya karta wo itni der se mere ghar ke bahar chilla rahi thi,PAPPI-TE LE LO, PAPPI-TE LE LO..
862
संता- यार मैं सोच रहा हूं.. शादी कर लूं। बंता - अबे पगला गया है क्या घर से क्यों हाथ धोना चाहता है। संता- अबे शादी कर रहा हूँ, इसमें घर जाने से क्या मतलब... बंता- अबे बीवी घर बेच देगी संता- तू पागल हो गया है, वो घर क्यों बेचेगी बंता- देख फूलवाली फूल बेचती है, सब्जीवाली सब्जी बेचती है, तो घरवाली घर नहीं बेचेगी..??
560
संता- यार मैं सोच रहा हूं.. शादी कर लूं। बंता - अबे पगला गया है क्या घर से क्यों हाथ धोना चाहता है। संता- अबे शादी कर रहा हूँ, इसमें घर जाने से क्या मतलब... बंता- अबे बीवी घर बेच देगी संता- तू पागल हो गया है, वो घर क्यों बेचेगी बंता- देख फूलवाली फूल बेचती है, सब्जीवाली सब्जी बेचती है, तो घरवाली घर नहीं बेचेगी..??
555
बंता- जेल को हिंदी में हवालात क्यों कहते हैं? संता- क्योंकि जेल में खाने को सिर्फ हवा और लात ही मिलती है
1001
Santa:- Yar iska matlab kya hota hai, "I AM GOING"
Banta:- Main jaa raha hun.
Santa:- Saaley, aise kaise jayega, 20 aur bhi aise ja chuke hain....answer bata ke jaa..
504
Snta: Where were you born? Bnata: India .. Santa: which part? Banta: What 'which part'? Whole body was born in India .
613
बंता: यार संता, मोहब्बत शादी से पहले होनी चाहिए या शादी के बाद? संता: शादी से पहले हो या शादी के बाद बस पत्नी को इसकी हवा भी नहीं लगनी चाहिए।
705