Back
Rajaan's Joke
snta to bnta

snta to bnta
tu doctor k paas nai gaya teri tabiyat kharaab thi
bnta to snta
ha wo kal jaauga aaj tabiyat tjick nai hai 

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Khood ko kar kanjoos itna ki

Khood ko kar kanjoos itna ki ....


har sms bhejhne se pahale ....

Service center wale khud call kar ke puche...

Beta sach mai is sms ko aage bhejna hai ya

Galti se sent ho Sent ho gaya! 

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
15 years back

15 years back :-
.
.
maa bap chahte the ke unki Ladki
ki shadi "acche ladke" se ho:p
. .
or abb :D
.
.
.

maa bap chahte he ki unke BETE ki
shadi "acchi ladki " se ho :p;)
.
.
( Ladkiyo , kya tarakki ki he tumne waah......!! )

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
kitni shiddat se maine book uthane ki koshish ki hai

"kitni shiddat se maine book uthane ki koshish ki hai...
.
.
.
ki har panne ne mujhe sulane ki sajish ki hai..
.
.
.
kehte hai agar kisi chapter ko dil se samajhna chaho..

to puri kaaynat hame usme confuse karne me jut jati hai...
.
.
par padhna padta hai...

qki..
"CHAPTER ABHI BAKI HE MERE DOST"...

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Hindi Names Of Hollywood Movies:

Hindi Names Of Hollywood Movies:
.
Taken : Le Li..
Taken 2 : Uski bhi Le Li..
.
The Dark Knight :Kala Kaluta Shoorveer..
.
.
Wrong Turn : Galat Mod Le Liya Be.
Wrong Turn 2 : Saala Phir Se Galat Mod Liya.
.
Terminator : Bhasmasur.
.
Welcome To The Jungle :Anil Kapoor Ki Chhaati Me Aap Ka Swagat Hai .
.
The Mummy Returns :Mataji Vaapas Aa Rahi Hain.
.
SAW: Dekha
SAW 2: Phir Se Dekha
SAW 3: Ek Baar Phir Se Dekha
.
Inception : Khwab Mein Khwab, Dimaag Ka Dahi Janaab!!!
.
.
Titanic : Nauka Dela Dhoka.
.
Babys day out :ghara ke bahar launda
.
Mission Impossible :Eie Na Ho Paai.
Mission Impossible 2 :Abe Eie Na Ho Paai
Mission Impossible 3 :Abe Hum Pehle Hi Kahe Rahe Ki Eie Na Ho Paai :p :D

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Jab bhi tumhari yaad aati hai

Jab bhi tumhari yaad aati hai,
to man karta hai.. har patthar par likhu 'I MISS YOU'..


Aur wo sare patthar tumhe maaru, taaki tumhe pata chale ki yaad me kitna dard hota hai... ;)

TIGER D 

Nov,8 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Most STUPID questions people usually ask

Most STUPID questions people usually ask
in obvious situation..
1. At movies:" hey! What r u doing here.. ??
Me:" tujhe nahi pata yaar.. ?? Mai yaha
ticket black karne aata hu..
2. In bus:" A fat lady steps onmy feet:
"arey!! beta lagi to nahi..
Me:" Nai aunty bahot maja aaya ek baar fir
se karo na..
3. When i got woken up at midnight by a
call:" sorry yaar!
So raha tha kya.. ??
Me:" Nai yaar! Mai to Bas late kar marne ki
practise kar raha tha..
4. when they see me with shorter hair:
"yaar! Baal katwaye hai kya.. ??
Me:" Pata Nahi Yaar!! raat ko soya tha
subah uth kar dekha
to andar chale gaye!!
.
5. When some 1 call me on myland line n
asks "where r u.. ??
Me:" yaar mai market mai hu, phone b gale
me latka kar le aaya hu..

Nov,7 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Husband apne sasural me biwi se: aaj sex ho jaye

Husband apne sasural me biwi se: aaj sex ho jaye..

Biwi: Nahi hum papa ke ghar hai..

Hus:To kya mere BAAP ka ghar Randikhana hai jo roz taiyar ho jati hai...! 

Nov,7 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Neta Ji Ne Bola Tha Ki

Neta Ji Ne Bola Tha Ki
"Tum Log Mujhe Khun Do,
Hum Tumko Azadi Dunga.."
.
.
.
.
Main Kahata Hu Ki
"Tum Mujhe Sms Karo,
Me Tume REPLY Dunga.." 

Nov,7 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
According ToWilliam Sexfear’sResearch

According ToWilliam Sexfear’sResearch
How To Satisfy A Woman: “Caress, Excite, Cuddle, Fascinate, Spoil, Kiss, Rub, Tease, Pamper, Console, Worship, Respect & Love.”
How To Satisfy A Man: “Give Him ABlow Job“by sushil 

Nov,7 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
AAJKAL KE BACCHE AUR UNKE

....AAJKAL KE BACCHE AUR UNKE
DOUBTS !!!!
....
Babli - Teacher Teacher! 'Bus' Male
hai ya Female ?
.
(Teacher thinks 'such a cute question)
Suddenly another kid (Bunty) replied-
.
.
Teacher, Teacher It's Female
.
Babli-Why?
.
Bunty-Kyoki Sab Log Uspe Chadte
Hain, Idiot.
.
Teacher got tensed with answer
whereas
.
Babli In Doubt again-Agar Bus Female
Hai Aur Sab Uspe Chadte Hain To
Uske Bacche- Kyo nahi hote ?
.
Teacher more tensed...
.
.
Bunty again with answer-Kyoki Sab Us
Par Peeche Se Chadte Hai duffer.
.
Teacher sharm se pani pani.
.
But Babli still in doubt-Maana Sabhi
Peeche Se Chadte Hain, par Driver
Aur Conductor To Aagay Se Chadte
Hain. Phir Bachche -Kyon Nahin Hote?
.
Teacher Ki Saanse band.
.
Bunty's final reply-Kyon Ki Woh Dono
Topi pehanke Chadte Hain.
.
.
Teacher Behosh! 

Nov,7 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Mashoor Rand

Mashoor Rand'
Ne Arz Kiya Hai.
.
.
'Aane Wale Aate Hai,
Jaane Wale Jaate Hai..
.
.
.
Yaade Bas Unki Reh Jaati Hai,
Jo Gand Sujaa Ke Jaate Hai. 

Nov,6 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
I'm coming to see you honey

Boyfriend: I'm coming to see you honey.

Girlfriend: Alright baby.

Boyfriend: I love you, I can't wait to see you... I'm getting ready to leave now.

Girlfriend: Okay but honey, I'm on my period, just letting you know incase.

Boyfriend: My car just broke down, I can't come and see you.

Girlfriend: Get your friend to bring you, like he always does.

Boyfriend:: He got shot by armed robbers so I can't come, I'm sorry.

Girlfriend: Oh never mind, I'm not on my period.

Boyfriend:: My friend has just been discharged from hospital and he has said he's okay, he's fine and he will take me now. I'm coming sweetheart.

Girlfriend: Sh*t! I'm really on my period, just did not notice.

Boyfriend:: Damn! He has been shot again. I can't come!! 

Nov,6 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
The best ever English to hindi dictionary

The best ever English to hindi dictionary for guys:
xcuse me= sun chutiye;
stupid= abe gandu;
get out= Nikal bhosdike;
I m in problem = Yaar Loude lag gaye;
I am scared= gaand phati hui hai yaar;
Where r u= Abbey Kahan maa chuda raha hai;
Would u like to have this= lega laudu;
Not possible!!!= chal bhosdike;
He is a very bad person= Bada madarchod hai;
I'm sorry = maa chuda;
Where r u? = kahan gaand mara raha hai?;
I 4give u! = muh mei le le;
No = ghanta;
Too small= jhaant barabar;
Too big= gaandfaadu;
Difficulty= gaand faat gayi;
We rock= maa chod di;
And finally the best one:
Dost= laude......:D :D :D 

Nov,6 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
A man and his frnd

a man and his frnd was talking aftr a lng tym....the man asked he friend can u help me in taking my chapel from upstairs coz im feeling cold and even im havng legpain thz y i cant get it myself ...............the frnd went upstairs for talking the chapel then he saw the 2 beutiful daughter of his frnd and said them " ur dad sent me upstairs to hav sex with u both" no way rplyed the dauters. the frnd asked the daughts fater loudly "should i take both of them?" infort of the daughters and yes was the rply by the fater 

Nov,6 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
A gay when says this thing

A gay when says this thing…

agar yeh ladki itni khoobsurat hai toh iska bhai kitna handsome hoga.



looks so creative behen ke through brother tak pauchna. 

Nov,6 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dear GIRLS

Dear GIRLS
.
.
Aap logo ke Mob No.. pr agar koi Faltu
ki
calls ya miss call kar k pareshan kar
raha ho .
.
.
To uska mob no.. Olx me daal kar post
kar do ki -- i phone 5s
Only 1000 rs.. Mai
.
.
.
Kasam se jitne Calls aapko nai kiya
hoga Usse jyada
use Aayenge
.
.
.
NOTE:- Ab Thanks bol ke rulana mat
Bas ek "SMILE" Krdo kaafi hai..
B+ 

Nov,5 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Santa on phone

Santa on phone:

Doctor my wife is pergnant.She is having pain right

now.

Doctor: Is this her first child?

Santa: No this is her husband speaking… 

Nov,5 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
BHAKT

BHAKT-'Baba Chut or Chutiye me kya antar hai?
BABA-'Jo aadmi ko pagal kar de use chut kehte hai,
Aur Jo chut ke piche pagal ho jaye use Chutiye.

Nov,5 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ek Aurat Auto Rukwa Kar Paise Tay

Ek Aurat Auto Rukwa Kar Paise Tay
Karte-
Karte Doosre Auto Mein Baith Gayi.
Pehla Auto Wala Hadbadi Mein Jaldi-
Jaldi Se Bola.
Auto Wala: ?Ye Kya Baat Hui, Madam?
Khada Aapne Mera Karwaya, Aur Chadd
Doosre Par Gayi?? 

Nov,5 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ek Admi Ke Bete Ki Shadi Hone Wali Thi

Ek Admi Ke Bete Ki Shadi Hone Wali Thi To Vo Furniture Wale Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola.

Aadmi: ?Mistri Ji, Bed Zara Majbut Banana, Mere Ladke Ne Bahu Pe Chadna Hai?

Ab Mistri Bhi Pura Kameena Tha, Bola: ?Ji Chinta Na Kijiye, Aisa Majboot Bed Banaunga Ki Sara Mohalla Bhi Bahu Pe Chad Jaaye To Bhi Nahi Tutega.? 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ek Admi Ke Bete Ki Shadi Hone Wali Thi

Ek Admi Ke Bete Ki Shadi Hone Wali Thi To Vo Furniture Wale Ke Pass Gaya Aur Bola.

Aadmi: ?Mistri Ji, Bed Zara Majbut Banana, Mere Ladke Ne Bahu Pe Chadna Hai?

Ab Mistri Bhi Pura Kameena Tha, Bola: ?Ji Chinta Na Kijiye, Aisa Majboot Bed Banaunga Ki Sara Mohalla Bhi Bahu Pe Chad Jaaye To Bhi Nahi Tutega.? 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Sunny leone in Khana Khazana

Sunny leone in Khana Khazana: Aaj main Aapko "Kele ka Kofta" banana sikhati hoon.
Sabse pehle 1 saaf mota Kela lein.
.
..
...
....
Agar lene mein maza aa raha hai to lete rahein.
Kofte ki Maa ka Bhosda
fir kabhi ban jayega! 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Baba Sex ki Goli Bech Raha Tha

Baba Sex ki Goli Bech Raha Tha
1 Goli Lega 1 Feet Lamba
2 Goli Lega 2 Feet Lamba
SARDAR
Baba 10 Goli Lu To?

BABA
madarchod Ladki Chodega Ya Borewell khodega

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Suhag raat mein

Suhag raat mein.
BUILDER: Tere hoth Duplex jaise hain, figure Landscape Garden ki tarah hai.
WIFE: Ab Bhumi-Pujan bhi karoge ya mazdoor bulaun.

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
ek larka pani me naha raha tha

ek larka pani me naha raha tha .tabi ek larki boil snake hai to larka goal snake nahi hai .who mera lund hai .. 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ho rahi thi aadhi raat

Ho rahi thi aadhi raat,
Arjun ne thama Dropadi ka hath

Kaha-Tumhe jeet kar me laya

Phir tumko chodne ka sukh mere bhaiyo ne kaise paya

Dropadi boli Ar
jun tum ho Gandu

Bcoz tumhara pita tha Pandu

Maza to aata hai lene me Bhim ka

Jaise ghus raha ho Tana Neem ka

Nakul Sehadev to abhi bacche hai

Choda n kriya mei abi kacche hai

Kabhi zid karte hai to chut dikhla deti hu

Dhire 2 mutth marna sikhla deti hu

Yudhistar to hai Bharmchari

Jisne meri chut ab tak nahi mari

Tum maar lo meri gand, kyonki ye chut to hai ab bhim ke naam 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Teacher: Pappu batao

Teacher: Pappu batao, yeh sign (%) tumne kaha dekha……. Awsme answer by Pappu:Teacher ji, jab car me ladkiya sit belt pehnti hain Tab

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dad gajab ho gaya, bhai darwaja nahi! khol raha

Dad gajab ho gaya, bhai darwaja nahi! khol raha.
Dad: kal uski suhagraat thi.
Son: Kal raat ko bhai ne cold cream mangi thi maine
fevicol de diya bhul se.

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Smartest person

Just saw the most smartest person when i was in front of the mirror

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
An egg fell down from a 20 ft table

An egg fell down from a 20 ft table ... but did not break .. !

Do you know the reason ..

Guess .... ....

ha ..ha .. it was "Lucky"..

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Physics PJ

Physics PJ:
Why does a dumb cat fall while walking....

Coz the cat is dumb so it cant Mew. So Mew(coefficient of friction) is = 0.
SO it falls! HaHa!

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Mother-in-laws

Mother-in-laws runin a marathon.Wat wud u cal it..

..

..

Race Saason ki!

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
O Zara zara Touch Me

Yesterday in my room all my books were singing a song.
Guess which song..
guess!
.
.
.
O Zara zara Touch Me Touch Me Touch Me..

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
How can you lift an elephant with one hand

How can you lift an elephant with one hand..



Ans:
YOU dont find elephants with one hand grin.png haha sorry!

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Really Bad PJ

Really Bad PJ:
Q: Why do people who have so much pressure drink so much..
.
.
.
A: Well, people drink at a bar.. And bar is the unit of pressure 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Liquid state

Bay of Bengal is in which state..

..

..

..

Liquid state wink.png

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Mai paida Mumbai me hua

[Head Crack Pj] Sam: Mai paida Mumbai me hua, Par padhai Chennai se ki hai . Tom: Phir to rooj aane-jane me bahut der lagti hogi na?

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
1 Ladki se 1 Ladke ne dil manga

1 Ladki se 1 Ladke ne dil manga
To ladki ne kaha kal dungi
Next day ladki apne sath bachha Lekr ayi or ladke ko de diya kyu?
Dil to bachha he ji.

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
About c.i.d

About c.i.d
Rin lagaya or daag gaya
Wah Wah
Rin lagaya or daag gaya
Abhijeet: Daya lagta hai,
Khooni bhaag gaya.

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Vasmol ne kiya kamaal

Zindagi Ne Kiye Hain Bahut
Se Sitam
.
.
.
Teri Kasam
.
.
.
Shayari Khatam
.
.
.
Dekho Dus Ka Dum
.
.
.
Paayal Baje Cham Cham
.
.
.
Mobile Mein Balance Kam
.
.
.
Raat Ko Dikhta Hai Kam
.
.
.
P.J. Kyun Nahi Ho Raha
Khatam
.
.
.
Do You Believe In Pichla
Janam
.
.
.
Mere Dil Mein Hain Bahut
Saare Gham
.
.
.
Haddi Mazboot Karta Hai
Calcium
.
.
.
Shakespeare Ka Pehla
Naam Tha William
.
.
.
Daanth Kharab Karta Hai
Chewing Gum
.
.
.
Exam Mein Marks Aate Hain
Minimum
.
.
.
Hum Khe
.
.
.
Hum Khelte Hain Maximum
.
.
.
Explain The Following
Term
.
.
.
Main Peeta Nahi Whiskey,
Beer Ya Rum
.
.
Hum Dil De Chuke Sanam
.
.
Khushi ke baad aata hai gum
.
.
.
Coffee me pite cheeni kam
.
.
.
Dukh me peete hai whisky aur rum
.
.
.
.
Pak me chalte hai goli our bum.
.
.
.
China Dikhata hai apna dum.
.
.
.
Ye kis P.J me phaans gaye hum
.
.
.
Diga diga dum dum
.
.
.
lo P.j khatam
.
.
.
Vande Matram.......

I Like SMS - Like: 1552 - SMS Length: 1009
Tags: Poor Jokes (P.J's) -
2 years ago
 

Disco:- Bar mein kyu hai Dhamaal...??
.
.
.
Disco:- Bar mein kyu hai Dhamaal.....?
.
.
A.C.P bola: Daya , surakshit kaale mere baal , Vasmol ne kiya kamaal...tongue.png=D grin.png=D

 

Nov,4 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Aam ke mausam

Aam ke mausam me bhi Maaza peene walo Aap Chutiye Hain

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Agar aap subah subah

Agar aap subah subah apne bade se tablet main head phones lagakar jogging karte hai aur yeh karke apne aap ko cool samjhte hai phir toh wahan hagne ke liye aaye kutte bhi bhonk bhonk ke kahenge ki Aap Chutiye Hain

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
2-4 Hollywood movies

2-4 Hollywood movies with subtitles dekh kar aap total Hindi movies ko inferior quality ka batate hai to Deshdrohi 2 ka superstar bhi aapko kaan me aake kahega ki Aap Chutiye Hain

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
43 degree garmi mein

43 degree garmi mein, farewell pe stud dikhne ke chakkar mein suit pehen ke photo khichwane wale Engineering students, Haseena nahi aapko aapka behta hua paseena kahega ki Aap Chutiye Hain

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
CD/DVD

Agar aap abhi tak film torrent se download krne ki bajaye CD/DVD rent par la kar dekhte ho to begam nawazish ali ki mardangi ki kasam Aap Chutiye Hain

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Baba ramdev

Wo Aankh badi hi pyari thi
Jo usne Humko maari thi,
.
.
.
.
Hum to MUFT mai fida ho gaye
DOSTO
Humko kya pata tha ki unko,
Baba ramdev ki bimari thi..

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Eek ladki umbrella repiring krane

Eek ladki umbrella repiring krane,
Macnic ke pas gayi or macnic se boli,
Umbrella ka kya karna hoga..
Macnic bola uppar ka kapda utarna hoga,
Niche se danda ghusana hoga.
Ladki boli jo kuch karna hai jaldi karo,
Magar pani nahi girna chahiye.

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Jungle Mai Cheeta Bidi Pine Wala Tha

Jungle Mai Cheeta Bidi Pine Wala Tha,
1 Chuha Aaya Aur Bola..
"Bhai, Chhod Do Nasha, Aao Mere Sath,
Dekho Jungle Kitna Khoobsurat Hai !"
Cheeta Chuhe K 7 Chal Diya.
Agey Hathi Drugs Le Raha Tha.
Chuhe Ne Usey Bhi Yehi Sab Kaha,
Haati Bhi 7 Chal Diya.
Agey Sher Whisky Pine Wala Tha.
Chuhe Ne Usey Bhi Kaha.
Sher Ne Glass Rakha Aur
Chuhe Ko 5 Thappd Mare.
Haathi- Kyu Maar Rahe Ho Bechare Ko ?
Sher- Iss Saale Ne Kal Bhi Bhang Pi Ke
Mujhe 3 Ghante Jungle Mai Ghumaya Tha.

Nov,3 2014
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Feedback  | Contact us  | Disclaimer