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Liza's Joke
Swami Vivekananda


Take up one idea. Make that one idea your life - think of it, dream of it, live on that idea. Let the brain, muscles, nerves, every part of your body, be full of that idea, and just leave every other idea alone. This is the way to success. -Swami Vivekananda

Jun,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
yaad mein roya

Zindgi ke safar ko lafzo mein piroya hai
Apni har gazal ko dard mein bhigoya hai
Plz aaj wah wah na kehna
Kyun ki aaj fir ye dil kisi ki yaad mein roya hai.

 

Jun,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
one star


All i think about is u
if there was one star for the love
I have for u then
It would be day time all the time

Jun,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Chad Gaya


Girl: aaj office jate hi boss mujpe chad gaya
Friend: Kyu?
Girl: Main late gayi thi.

Jun,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Important Day Of Life

Three important days in my life.
The day i was born
The day you were born
The day when I and you become we.

Jun,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Kabhi To Khona Tha

Tujh ko paa kar bhi kabhi to khona tha,
ye hadsa mere saath kabhi to hona hi tha,
wo tod kar aksar dil mera mujhe jodta raha,
jaise main us ke haath ka koi khilona tha.

Jun,6 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Modi Sarkaar

Ab To Modi Sarkaar Bhi Aa Gayee,
Par Wo Ladkiya Kahi Dikh Nahi Rahi, Jo Kehti Thi
Muft Me Dungi Har Baar
Par Ab Ki Baar Modi Sarkar.

Jun,6 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
I've won

Bf: Pack ur bag honey, I've won Rs.10 crore in a lottery.
Gf: Wow Thailand or Switzerland?
Bf: Who Cares? You just pack ur bag & GET LOST.

Jun,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bohot pasand hai

Boy: Mummy uska naam Jasmine kyoo hai?
Mom: kyoki uske papa ko wo flower bohot pasand hai
Boy: To phir mera naam aisa kyo?
Mom: Gotiya faltu ki bakwas bandd kar

Jun,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Janu You Are Princess

Boy: Janu you are Cute
Girl: Thanks jaan
Boy: Janu you are Princess
Girl: Awww jaan thankss Kya kar rahe ho??
Boy: Mazak.

Jun,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
U a Bright

Throughout this Year may Ur life
be filled with little celebration of Happiness..
Wishes U a Bright
Happy and Prosperous New Year 2015 .

Jun,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Saath rahunga

Pati: mere marne ke baad, kyaa tum doosri shaadi karogi?
Patni: nahi. main apni behan ki saath rahungi. aap?
Pati: main bhi tumhaare behan ke saath rahunga

Jun,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Pakistan

TEACHER:
Woh kon sa Event tha jo na hota tou Pakistan khush haal hota?
PAPPU:
Zardari di Maa da Viyah.
_______________________

Jun,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Mahatma Gandhi

Where there is love there is life.

Jun,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bahut baar

Roka unhe bahut baar
Ab nahi rokenge hum
Thokar kha chuke har baar
Ab thak se gaye hai hum.

 

Jun,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Alcohal Rubbing

Why do they cotton swab the guy's arm with rubbing alcohol before a lethal injection? 

May,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Blood vessel

If you try to suppress a sneeze, you can rupture a blood vessel in your head or neck and die.

May,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Banging Your Hand

Banging your head against a wall uses 150 calories an hour.

May,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Wrestler

 

Mohanlal was a professional wrestler.

 

May,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Garibi Ki HAdh

Question: 
Gharibi Ki Hadh Kya Hy?

Ans:
Jb Ek Ladki 2 Rupay Me Kiss Dene 
Ko Tyar Ho Or Ap K Pas Sirf 1 Rupya Ho

May,26 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Amit Shah Told Me

Obama:You are fasting.
Modi:How u know?
O:CIA told me.
M: Michelle bhabhi gave u spicy food today.
O:HOW D HELL U KNOW?
M:Amit Shah told me.

May,26 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
khubsurat banane ki

Hasrat hain sirf tumhey paaney ki,
Aur koi khawahish nahi is deewane ki,
Shikwa mujhe tumse nahi khuda se hai,
Kya zarurat thi tumhe itna khubsurat bnane ki

May,26 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Payara School

LECTURE ME MASTI THI
HAMARI BHI KUCH HASTI THI
TEACHER KA SAHARA THA DIL YE AAWARA THA
KAHAN AA GAYE IS DEGREE KI AAFAT MEIN YAAR WO SCHOOL HI KITNA PAYARA THA

May,26 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Photography

Life is like photography, you use the negatives to develop.

May,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Love letter

New style of love letter:

To,
The janeman
I LOVE YOU,

SUB- application for love.
Jaan, i beg to say that i am student of ur heart.
I am lonely. I cant live without u. So kindly grant my love.

Ur LOVE

May,18 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
CALL NOW


I found a Leaflet in my newspaper this morning which read,
“ARE YOU AN ALCOHOLIC? CALL NOW. WE CAN HELP!”
My wife insisted I make the call..
I Called up.
It Was A Liquor Shop Offer : “Buy 3 & Get 1 Free”…
My eyes were filled with tears of joy

May,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Khul jayega

Modi Sarkar ko ab daaru dogune daam par bechni chahiye..
Aur aadha paisa peene wale ki patni ke account mein subsidy ki tarah wapas kar dena chahiye, jisse 2 fayde honge!
1. Patniya apne patiyo ko peene ke liye kabhi mana nahin karegi!
2. Jis ki patni ka account nahin hai.. wo bhi khul jayega!

May,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
From IIN

Boys goes to cyber cafe..
Boy-भैया रिजल्ट चेक करना है
He-रोल न. बताओ
Boy-971611××××
He- ये कहा का रोल न. है
Boy-IIN का i m frm IIN

May,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
SMS Karte Rahe

Agar Aapke Pass Cell Phone Hai Aur Us Ladki Ke Paas Bhi ( Jise Aap Patana Chahte Hai), To Aksar Usko Funny SMS Yaa Love SMS Yaa Friendship SMS Bhejte Rahe. Aisa Karne Se Aap Unki Yaado Me Bane Rahenge.

May,11 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Maine Paya

God ne achcha dil banaya jo mene paya
Fir God ne achcha dimag bnya jo maine paya
Fir God ne 1achcha dost bnya
O hello
Is bar mene nhi Aapne paya

May,11 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Hansi Mazak

Unse Hamesha Hansi Mazak Karte Rahe, Lekin Ek Limit Me Hi.

May,7 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dekhte Rahe

Ladkiyan Agar Group Me Ho To Aap Unhe (Jinhe Patana Hai) Hi Dekhte Rahe, Aisa Karne Se Wo Bhi Aap Ke Taraf Attract Ho Jayegi.

May,7 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Whats app

Sala samjh me nahi aa raha hai
Bazaar me mandi hai esliye loge ‘Whatsapp’ par hai!!!
Ya log pura din ‘Whatsapp’ par lage huye hain..
esliye bazaar me mandi hai ..

May,7 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak

Kapil to Sharukh kahan :- Kaisi hai tumhari biwi ?

Sharukh khan :- Swarg ki apsara jaisi aur tumhari biwi ?

Kapil :- Meri toh abhi zinda hai !

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Thoko Taliyaan

Baarish ke mausam me kya apka jee machalta hai,

Kya paani me bhigne ka bhi apka dil karta hai,

Isme aapki galti nahi hai,

Ish mausam me har Mendhak aise hi fudakta hai....


Thoko Taliyaan.....

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Itni Mohabbat,

Mat kar dost apni girl friend se itni mohabbat,
Woh aankhon se war karti hai,
Maine dekha hai uski aankhon me,
Woh mujhse bhi pyar karti hai

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Kya Baat Hai

Aap ke SMS ki kya baat hai,
Aap ke SMS lajawab hai,
Ab phone bhi karo janemann,
Hume pata hai,
Aapki aawaz main bhi kuch baat hai.

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
कुछ बदमाश लड़कों

एक बार कुछ बदमाश लड़कों ने Collage के
नोटिस बोर्ड पर लिख दिया-
” 50% लड़कियां बेवकूफ होती हैं ..”
लड़कियों ने ये देखा तो उन्हें बहुत
बुरा लगा उन्होंने collage में हंगामा खड़ा कर
दिया ..!!
कॉलेज प्रबंधन ने तुरंत उस नोटिस
को निकलवाया
और उसकी जगह नया नोटिस लगवाया -
“50% लड़कियां बेवकूफ नहीं होती हैं “..
तब जाकर लड़कियों का गुस्सा शांत हुआ ..

May,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bhag Gaya

Bhukamp Ki khabar sunte hi….
Admin ghar se bahar bhag Gaya ha
Abhi tak koi pata nahi ..
Kisi ko dikhai de to Bata dena!!

May,1 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Movie Biwi

Wife: Kal aap ne Padosan ke saath moovi dekhi..?

Husband: Kya kare..
Aaj kal ki movie Biwi Bachon ya family ke
saath dekhne laayak kaha banti hai..?

Apr,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Jaldi Dikhao

Ek Class Men Girls Aur Boys
Ka Shair O Shayri Ka Mukabla Tha
Girls: Hum Tumhai Hara ke Dikhayen ge..
Boys: Hum Haar Gaye.. Jaldi Dikhao..

Apr,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak

टीचर :” एक KISS बहुत ही खतरनाक होता है.”
स्टूडेंट: ” कैसे ?”
टीचर :” एक बार में चालीस हजार कीटाणु ट्रांसफर हो जाते हैं “.
स्टूडेंट : ” इसका कोई इलाज है आपकी नजर में ?”
टीचर :” इसका कोई इलाज नहीं है “.
स्टूडेंट : ” मेरे पास है इसका शर्तिया इलाज “.
टीचर :” क्या इलाज हो सकता है ?”
स्टूडेंट : ” KISS को वापस लौटा दो

Apr,28 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
My Boyfriend

Last night my boyfriend
and I got into a fight.
I told him to get what’s his and leave.
He picked me up and walked out the door.
I really love him

Apr,28 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
I need

Open with Love…
If I disturb U
I am Sorry!
But I need
To Say
I…
Love…
Disturbing you…

Apr,28 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Sleeping


Sleeping to forget some things..!! :(

Apr,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bijli Nhi Thi

Young girl: Dadiji Aap ke zamane mein 10-10 bacche kyo hote the?
Old lady: Beti Hamare time bijli nahi thi.
Raat ko kaun aaya kaun gaya malum nahi padta tha.

Apr,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Be Indian

Apr,24 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
KAAM DHANDA

New Version of Old Dialogue:
Mere Paas Facebook Hai
Twitter Hai
Orkut Hai
Tumhare Pas Kya Hai?

Smart Boy Answer:
Mere Paas “KAAM DHANDA” hai!

Apr,24 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
What is Kiss?

What is Kiss? Kiss is an upper preparation for lower invasion, that will lead to further penetation,in fast acceleration that will build the next generation.

Apr,21 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
When I saw you

When I saw you, I was afraid to meet you... When I met you, I was afraid to kiss you... When I kissed you, I was afraid to love you... Now that I love you, I'm afraid to lose you."

Apr,21 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
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