STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
टीचर :” एक KISS बहुत ही खतरनाक होता है.”
स्टूडेंट: ” कैसे ?”
टीचर :” एक बार में चालीस हजार कीटाणु ट्रांसफर हो जाते हैं “.
स्टूडेंट : ” इसका कोई इलाज है आपकी नजर में ?”
टीचर :” इसका कोई इलाज नहीं है “.
स्टूडेंट : ” मेरे पास है इसका शर्तिया इलाज “.
टीचर :” क्या इलाज हो सकता है ?”
स्टूडेंट : ” KISS को वापस लौटा दो
1
Last night my boyfriend
and I got into a fight.
I told him to get what’s his and leave.
He picked me up and walked out the door.
I really love him
1
Open with Love…
If I disturb U
I am Sorry!
But I need
To Say
I…
Love…
Disturbing you…
1
Sleeping to forget some things..!! :(
1
Young girl: Dadiji Aap ke zamane mein 10-10 bacche kyo hote the?
Old lady: Beti Hamare time bijli nahi thi.
Raat ko kaun aaya kaun gaya malum nahi padta tha.
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1
New Version of Old Dialogue:
Mere Paas Facebook Hai
Twitter Hai
Orkut Hai
Tumhare Pas Kya Hai?
Smart Boy Answer:
Mere Paas “KAAM DHANDA” hai!
1
What is Kiss? Kiss is an upper preparation for lower invasion, that will lead to further penetation,in fast acceleration that will build the next generation.
1
When I saw you, I was afraid to meet you... When I met you, I was afraid to kiss you... When I kissed you, I was afraid to love you... Now that I love you, I'm afraid to lose you."
1
SHARON: Have you ever had a hot passionate, burning kiss?
TRACY: I did once. He'd forgotten to take the cigarette out of his mouth.
1
It’s hard to leave behind those people who were once important in your life, but sometimes it’s necessary.
1
Why do 90%
of the girls have a bigger left breast ?
because….
90% of the
boys are
right handed..
1
Rabri: Ka karat ho?
Laalu: Ek dost ko chitthi likhat hu!
Rabri: Par tuhar likhna to aawe nahi.
Laalu: Vo sasura bhi to padhna nahi jaanat.
ÂÂ
1
Ek Aadmi: Kyun maar rahe ho is ko??
Sasur: Maine isko hospital se whatsapp kiya ki ‘Tum Baap Ban Gye Ho’
Saale ne usko bhi doston ko forward kar diya! :D
1
A boy at Marine Drive in romantic mood to his girlfriend: “I can see the whole world in your eyes.”
One Mumbaikar was passing-by. He asks, “Arey Ghatkopar pe traffic hai kya dekh na please.”
1
Q: What is the height of shock?
A: When you are having sex with a pregnant woman & suddenly a hand grabs your dick from inside!
1
Dil Ki Hasrat Zuban Pe Aane Lagi
Tune Dekha Aur Zindagi Muskurane Lagi
Yeh Ishq Ki Inteha Thi Ya Deewangi Meri
Har Soorat Mein Soorat Teri Nazar Aane Lagi.
1
Jo sheeshe ke ghar me rehte hain, woh basement mein kapde badalte hain.
1
LOVE ? In FraNce: its a comedy! in GeRmaNy: its a tRagedy! In Italy: its woNdeR! In India: . . . Its a NATIONAL GAME !
1
Wheat crop is ready for harvest;
Time to rejoice and feel nice;
Fruits to reap of blood and sweat;
And get joyous and celebrate life!
1
Hamesha Ladki ke aankho se aankhen milakar hi baat kare, isse Ladkiyan impress hoti hai.
1
Never underestimate the power of three things;
1. Wife angry for a reason;
2. Wife angry without reason
and
3. Wife about to get angry & looking for a reason.
1
Stage 1: Talk, talk and talk
Stage 2: Please talk to me
Stage 3: Don’t you dare talk to me
Stage 4: We need to talk..
1
Santa : what are u doing, bro?
Banta : dinner, followed by scotch
Santa : bhai, black label?
Banta : nahi bhai, scotch brite se bartan dho raha hun
1
Pita: Beta, ek zamana tha, jab main 10/- lekar bazaar jata tha aur kirana, sabzi doodh sab le aata tha
Beta: Pitaji ab zamana badal gaya hai, Aajkal har dukaan par CCTV-Camera lage hote hain!
1
Malinga ki Maa ne ek din us se kaha..
Beta:Ja apne bal cut kar ke aaja,
Malinga ne kaha kun kia baat hai,
Maa:Beta bartan dhone ka Scruber khatm ho gaya hai...
1
Teacher: Why are you late?
santa: Because of the sign.
Teacher: What sign?
santa: The one that says,
“School Ahead, Go Slow.”
1
ऑपरेटर- सर क्या आप को मेरी आवाज आ रही है?
दूसरी तरफ से अभी भी कोई आवाज नहीं आई।
ऑपरेटर- सर प्लीज, जवाब दीजिये, क्या आप मुझे सुन रहे हैं?
1
संता- जब मेरी नई नई शादी हुई थी तो मुझे मेरी बीवी इतनी प्यारी लगती थी कि मन करता था खा जाऊं। बंता- और अब? संता- खा ही जाता तो अच्छा था। -
1
जब भी आप उनसे मिले प्यार से उनके सिर को चूमें।
1
आप अपनी गर्लफ्रैंड की बातों को ध्यान से सुनें। क्यों कि हर लड़की चाहती है कि उसका प्रेमी उसका ख्याल रखे। इससे उसे यह महसूस होगा कि आप उसके सच्चे साथी हैं जो सुख-दुःख में काम आते हैं।
1
Kapil: Agar Bhagwan tumhari ek ichchha poori kare, to woh kya hogi?
Sumona: Ki aap aur main 7 janam saath rahein.. :-) aur aap kya mangoge?
Kapil: Yeh mera satwa janam ho!!
1
Aye khuda barish karwa de.
Ek katora pani bharwa de.
Jo mujhe sms nhi karta,uska/uski mobile ko is
katora main duba de.
Na rahega phone
Na bajega tone.
1
Ek aadmi sasural gaya,
Uski saas ne use 7 din tak
Subah-sham palak ka saag
khilaya.
8ve din pucha..Beta,kya khaoge?
Aadmi bola, khet dikha do,
Khud hi char aaunga.
1
arz kiya hai suniye...
Hm gye the unke ghar, kahna tha Dil se Dil mila lo..
Hm gaye the unke ghar, kahna tha Dil se Dil mila lo..
Aur
jub dekha unki mummy ko to bola..
Aunty bacche ko polio ki dwa pilwa lo...
1
A typical cook and eat restaurant is a wonderful experience for anyone. It helps you bond and laugh while you goof up, and awe when you cook up a perfect little dish!
1
Tell her your name first before you ask for hers. If she doesn't seem to like you, don't push her, just calmly walk away with a stiff smile. This will give her a sense of security and warmth and she'll tend to smile at you the next day. You should also reflect her smile. Slowly, conversation may start, if it doesn't, forget her.
1
Kitna pyara muskura lete ho,
Kitni asani se apna bana lete ho,
Itni dosti kaise nibha lete ho,
Kisi se sikha hai ya sirf meri nakal utar lete ho!
1
Aankhon ki gehraayi ko samajh nahi paate,
Hoth hai magar kuch hum keh nahi paate,
Apni Dil ki baat kis tarah kahe tumse,
Tum wahi ho jinke bina hum reh nahi paate.
1
Badi muddat baad
Aaj phone par uski awaz suni toh..
.
.
Dil ne dhadakte hue kaha..
.
.
Jaldi yaad kar kamine kaunsi wali hai..!!!
1
Ek BAR 1 judge ne
RAJNIKANT ko crime
karte hue dekh liya
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
toh kya?
tabse Kaanon andha ho gaya
1
DRIVING TEST:
POLICE: Wat do u do in red signal?
Boy: I usually text, check mails n browse facebook..!
MODERN GENERATION
2
Woh karte hai baat ishq ki,
Par ishq ke dard ka unhe ehsas nahi,
Ishq woh chand hai jo dikhta hai sab ko,
Par usse pana sab ke bas ka kaam nahi
1
Samunder me pani, pani me fish.
wah! wah!
Samunder me pani, pani me fish.
wah! wah!
Aap ko salam aur aap ki Girlfriend ko kiss…
Ab bol wah wah
1
Santa : Aaj papa ne pitayi kar di
Banta : Kyun?
Santa : Meine to sirf itna pucha “KAMINE” film
dekhne chal rahe ho ya ghar pe hi “BLUE” film dekhoge
44
The sun rises with new hope
Kites fly with vigour crops
Are ready to be harvested
All denoting hope,
Joy and abundance.
1
Larka ek Larki ka peecha kar raha tha.. . . . .
Girl:”Tumhe pata hai, peeche meri Maa aa rahi hai.. . . . . .
Larka:”Tu Tension Na Le Hum Khandani Aashiq hai.. . .
Teri maa ke peechey mera Baap aa raha hai..
Girl Shocked – Boy Rocked
1
Sooni zindagi me halchal mehsoos hui,bejan dil me dhadkan mehsos
hui,jane
kyu aaj aisa laga,shayad tumhari kami mehsoos hui.
1
Ladkiyon Ke Samne Kabhi Bhi Smoking Na Kare Aur Na Hi Drinking. Ye Baat Hamesha Yaad Rakhe Ladkiyan Good Manners Wale Ladko Ko Hi Pasand Karti Hai.
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Bhai ko Bhai se juda kr deti he - "GF" Maa ko Bete se juda kr deti he - "GF"
Pati aur Patni ke Beech Jhagda paida kr deti he- "GF"
Insan ko Duniya se juda kr deti he-
"GF"
Ghar me Jhagda karwa deti he -"GF
'GF" matlab - GALAT FEHMI
Jo is waqt aapko hui he.
Girl Friend to Bechari Masoom hoti he.
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