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Liza's Joke
DiL Mein Izzat

Santa Ek Bar Galati Se Ladies Toilet Chala Gaya
Sab Ladies Santa Ko Dekhkar Ek Sath Khadi Ho Gayi.
Santa: Baitho Baitho Bas DiL Mein Izzat Ho Utna Hi Kafi Hai

Jan,15 2016
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Deewana Hai..

Kaun Kehta Hai Ye Dil Pagal Hai,
Pagalpan To Bas Ek Bahaana Hai,
Ek Bar Muskura Kar To Dekho Lo,
Ye Pagal Dil Tumhara Deewana Hai.

Jan,14 2016
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Wish You Success

You Have To Get Up Every Morning
And Tell Yourself I Can Do This
Good Morning & Wish You Success

Jan,9 2016
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Wish You Success

You Have To Get Up Every Morning
And Tell Yourself I Can Do This
Good Morning & Wish You Success

Jan,9 2016
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Nichey Lund

Boy At Bar: Tum Ladki Hokey Daaru Peeti Ho.
Awesome Reply By Girl:
Toh Kya 2 4 Peg K Liye Nichey Lawda Lagwa Loon'

Jan,7 2016
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Hostel Me Rahte Hai.

Teacher To Papu : Tumne Home work Q Nahi Kiya.
Deadly Answr Given By
Papu: Sir Kyuki Hum To Hostel Me Rahte Hai

Jan,7 2016
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Tumhara Hi Rahega

Tum Hans Kar Girao Bijleeya Dil Par,
Ye Dil Jaan-e-Maan Tumhara Hi Rahega,
Katal Kar Do Ya Le Lo Jaan Meri,
Ye Bandaa Aashiq Tumhara Hi Rahega..

Jan,6 2016
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So Funny

Jan,5 2016
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Winter Season

Jan,5 2016
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Babuji Ka Jor

Bande Hai Hum Sanskari Hampe Babuji Ka Jor
Lena Unka Aashiread Nikale Rajeshree Ki Aur
Rishte Hai Folaadi Aur Virgin Har Kadam
Apni Aankho Kanyadaan Dekhne Aaj Chale Hai Hum

Jan,4 2016
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बीवी और गर्लफ्रेंड

Dec,31 2015
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Coffie Shop

Dec,28 2015
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Nagin Hi Chaiye

Dec,28 2015
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Mummy i Ki Yaad

Problems Shuro Hui To Aayi Mummy i Ki Yaad
Beach Probelem Ke Papa Ki Aayi Yaad
Abhi To University Ke Bhi Baqi Hain
Aayengi Yaad Nani Bhi Kuch Dinnon Ke Baad

Dec,23 2015
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Bura Haal

Gujar Gaye Kitane Din, Hogaye Kitne Saal
Gujar Gaye Kitane Din, Hogaye Kitne Saal
Par Aaj Bhi ACP Karta Hain Mujrim Ka Wahi Bura Haal.

Dec,19 2015
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Baitho Baitho

Santa: By Mistake Goes Into A Ladies Toilet 
All Ladies Suddenly Stand Up .
Santa : Izzat Dil Me Ho Yehi Kaafi Hai, Baitho Baitho.

 

Dec,19 2015
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Auraton Ko Maa

Teacher: Agar Apna Character Sudharna Hai
To Sab Auraton Ko Maa Kaha Karo.
Student: Madam Is Se Mera Character To Theek Rahega,
Par Mere Baap Ka Bigad Jayega.

Dec,18 2015
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हवस के भूके

लड़की: बेबी, कल मैं तुम्हारे लिए fast करूंगी.
लड़का: ना बेबी आराम से करेंगे, मज़े ले ले के धीरे धीरे फील के साथ..
लड़की: हवस के भूके कुत्ते मैं व्रत की बात कर रही हूँ.

Dec,17 2015
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Alok Nath Hon

Jab Babuji Alok Nath Hon,
Toh Emraan Hashmi Bhi Sanskari Hon Jata Hey.

Dec,16 2015
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Maalik Se Sawdhan

Rajnikanth's Dog's House Has a
Signboard On it, Saying.
Maalik Se Sawdhan.

 

Dec,15 2015
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Apne Mobile Se

Santa: Jab Bhi Wife Mera
Photo Apne Mobile Se Click Karti Hai
Mujhe Bahut Dar Lagta Hai.
Saala Kahi OLX Par na Laga De.

Dec,15 2015
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Kulfi Chus

Girl : Mujme Aisa Kya Dekha Ki Beech Bazar Propose Kar Diya
Boy : Jis Tarah Tu Kulfi Chus Rahi Thi.. Bas Apna Dil Aagaya

Dec,14 2015
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Condom Dekha

Riya: Aur Uski Do Friend Class Main Baaten Kar Rahi Thi
Poonam: Maine Sir Ke Table Par Condom Dekha
Rinki: Maine Toh Usmain Ched Kar Diya
Riya: Tune Mujhe Marva Diya Usi Condom Se Main Chudi

Dec,11 2015
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Bahan Ko Patayenge

Kya Hua Jo Usne Racha Li Mehndi,
Hum Bhi Ab Shehra Sajayenge.
Mujhe Pata Tha ki Vo Apne Nasib Main Nahi,
Ab Uski Choti Bahan Ko Patayenge

Dec,7 2015
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How to Close Pores Naturally

Slice an apple into thin slices. Place these on the face and leave for 15 minutes.
These soak up the extra oil and helps to close pores.
You may even make paste of apple peel, honey, vinegar, and a dash of multani mitti.
Apply for 30 minutes and rinse off with rose water.
Your skin will visibly tighten and will develop a healthy, radiant glow.

Dec,3 2015
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Wajan Kam Karne Ka Tarika

Dr: Roz 5km walk karo, to 1 sal me 50kg wajan kum ho jayega.
1 sal bad santa phone pe: Wajan to kam ho gaya,
Magar saale ghar kaise jau 1825km door aa gaya hu.

Dec,1 2015
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Tumhari Yaad


Tum door sahi majboor sahi,
Par yaad tumhari aati hai,
Jab saans wahan par leti ho,
To badboo yahaan tak aati hai.

Nov,30 2015
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Loneliness

Loneliness and the feeling of being unwanted is the most terrible poverty.

Nov,27 2015
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Jang Me

Santa: Mery dada ne 1857 ke jang me dushman ki tange kaat di thi.
Banta: Gardaan q nhi kati?
Santa: Wo pehle he kati hui thi.

Nov,27 2015
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Nek Se Karungi

Mohabbat to kisi 1 se karungi,
Ho sake to kisi nek se karungi,
Lekin jab tak na milega wo nek ladka,
TRY to har 1 ko karungi.

Nov,25 2015
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क्या लाया हूं

लड़का : जान देखो, मैं तुम्हारी जुल्फों के लिए क्या लाया हूं?
लड़की: सो स्वीट, क्या?
लड़का: जूं निकालने वाली कंघी .

Nov,25 2015
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Choice Is Yours

Husband: Dekho Main Chahe Jaisa Bhi Hoon,
Par Baccha Ek Dum Sunder Hona Chahiye.
Wife: Dekho Ji Choice Is Yours, Baccha Yaa
Toh Sunder Hoga Yaa Aap Ka Hoga.

Nov,24 2015
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Ghayal Karne Waale

Dekha hai tumhare aage,
Sharma ke phoolon ko murjhaate,
Aye jahan ko ghayal karne waale,
Tum deodorant kyun nahi lagaate.

Nov,23 2015
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Beautiful Story

A new year is like a blank book, and the pen is in your hands.
It is your chance to write a beautiful story for yourself.
Happy New Year.

Nov,21 2015
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Watch Sunrise Together

It might sound clichéd and seem like boring and laid back,
But this could be fun. Try getting up while it is still dawn,
To catch the first glimpse of the sunrise together.
Seeing a sunrise together brings in a sense of
New beginning and a fresh start for the newly married couples.

Nov,19 2015
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Translate Kro

Juhi: Is line ko english me translate kro.
Usne apna kaam kiya aur karta hi gya.
Kapil: He done his work and done dana dan done dana dan.

 

Nov,19 2015
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Meet With Smile

Let us always meet each other with smile, for the smile is the beginning of love.

Nov,18 2015
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Professional Training

Do you offer continuing education and professional training?
This is a great positioning question,
Showing that you are interested in expanding,
Your knowledge and ultimately growing with the employer.

Nov,18 2015
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Increase The Bacteria

Wearing headphones for just an hour will increase the bacteria in your ear by 700 times.

Nov,18 2015
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Ghanti Bjaata Hai

Bikhari Nhi Par Bikh Mangataa Hai,
Ladki Nhi Par Purse Isthemal Krta Hai,
Pujaari Nhi Par Ghanti Bjaata Hai.
Ans: Bus Conductor.

Nov,17 2015
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Hint To Do

Laloo to Rabri: Agar tum batao ki is bag ke andar kya hai, To sare eggs tumare.
Agar tum batao kitne eggs to 8 ke 8 tumare,
Aur agar tum bata do ke ande kiske hai to woh murgi bhi tumari.
Rabri: Laloo Ji, koi hint to do na plz?

Nov,17 2015
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Sikha Dena

Khafa hone se pehle khata bata dena,
Rulaane se pehle hansna sikha dena.
Agar jana ho kabhi hum se door aap ko,
Toh pehle bina saans liye jeena sikha dena.

Nov,16 2015
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Miss Under Standing

Santa: Ek Kunwari Ladki Niche Khadi Hai Ko English me Kis Tarah kahoge?
Banta: Boss, Malum Nahi.
Santa: Are Bewakoof Itna bhi Nahi Jantey Miss Under Standing (Misunderstanding).

Nov,10 2015
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Dressing Inappropriately

While smart casual might be the current trend, professional attire is
Still proper business etiquette for interviews. It is all about first impressions.

Nov,9 2015
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बेटे की शादी

एक बार संता ने अपने बेटे की शादी की.
बहू विदाई के बाद घर आ गई तब संता की पत्नी ,सास ने कहा: बेटी आज से मुझे मां और अपने ससुर को पापा कहना.
शाम को संता का बेटा ,पति के आने पर पत्नी बोली: मां भैया आ गए.

Nov,7 2015
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Rajni Was Born

Do you know?
When Rajni was born?
On 30 feb & scince then february
Decidec not to gove this day to anybody else.

Nov,6 2015
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Hippos

When hippos are upset, their sweat turns red.

Nov,3 2015
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Lime Juice

Use lime juice as a scrub Mix lime juice with sweet almond oil and sea salt.
Use your fingers or a cotton wool and apply it on your face in a circular motion.
This natural scrub will remove dead cells from your face giving a radiant glow.
Lime peel also aids in fading scars and pimple marks from face.

 

Nov,3 2015
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Lifeforms

There are more lifeforms living on your skin Then,
There are people on the planet.

Nov,3 2015
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Aitbar Nahi

1st Girl: Aaj Kal Ke Ladko Ka Koi Aitbar Nahi.
Main To Ab Uss kamine ka Mooh Bhi Nahi Dekhungi.
2nd Girl: Kyon Kya Hua?
Tumne Usey Kisi Aur Ladki Ke Sath Dekh Liya?
1st Girl: Nahi Usne Mujhe Kisi Aur Ladke Ke Sath Dekh Liya Hai,
Jab Ki Wo Kal Bol Raha Tha Ki Woh Out Of City Ja Raha Hai.

 

Nov,3 2015
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