STORY
VIDEOS
NON VEG
*Calls Vodafone Customer Care*
Call connects
Cust Representative: Hi I am Rashmi & I have boyfriend. How can I help you?
*Disconnects*
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Kapil ne
JOB k 1st din Computer pe 11 ghante guzare
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Boss khusi se: Good..
Aaj kya kiya
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Kapil: Keyboard ki ABCD aage piche lagi thi
Wo sahi kar di..
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SMS bhejan da nahi si shonk saanu,
teri yaad ne mobile fada dita,
Message likhde likhde space muki,
assi overwrite alloweed la dita,
yaara mereya message reply karin,
assi apna farz nibha dita!!
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Agar koi hume accha lagta hai to accha wo nahi hum hai…Aur agar koi hume bura lagta hai to bura wahi hai Kyunki hum to achche hain na…
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Ek cheenti auto mein baithi.. aur ek per bahar rakha..
Driver: Madam per andar kar lo
Cheenti: Nahin, mujhe haathi ko laat marni hai..
Saala kal aankh maar kar gaya tha!! :-D
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Boy To A Doctor: My Gf Is Pregnant Bt I Used Protection
Doctor: Ek Kahani Suno,
Ek Shikari Ek Din Gun Ki Jagah Umbrella Le Gaya,
Achanak Lion Samne Aaya To Usne Umbrella Ka Handle Khicha Aur Fire Kiya,
Lion Wahi Mar Gaya..
Boy: Ghantaa...!
Kissi Aur Ne Goli Mari Hogi..
Doctor: Exactly…!!
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Tute patte ka dard uski shakha se puchiye,
Dharti ki pyas barsat se puchiye,
Yaad karte hain hum aapko kitna,
Ye hum se nahi aap apne aap se puchiye
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Dil todna humari aadat nahi,
Dil hum kisi ka dukhate nahi,
Bharosa rakhna meri wafaon pe…
Dil me basa ke hum kisi ko Bhulate nahi..!!
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Banta is a teacher and exam ke liye Question Paper banaya..
Paper dekhte hi saare bachche behosh ho gaye... Question they --
1. China kis Desh me hai ?
2. 15 Aug kis Date ko Aati hai ?
3. Green Rang kis Colour ka Hota hai ?
4. Tamatar ko Hindi may kya Bolte hai ?
5. Mumtaz ki Qabar main Kon Dafan hai ?
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Boy to jyotishi.
BOY-Meri koi GIRLFRIEND kyon nahi ban rahi hai..?
Jyotishi- kaise banegi?
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KUNDLEE me SUKH HI SUKH likha hai.
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Wo kaunSa Department hai Jisme girls Kaam Nahi kar Sakti?
STUDENT: Fire Brigade
TEACHER: Wo Q?
STUDENT:girls ka Kaam AAG Lagaana hai,Bujaana Nahi..
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संता का पड़ोसी मर गया। वह उसके घर गया और पूछा- बॉडी आ गई क्या?
तभी ऐम्बुलेंस बॉडी लेकर आ गई।
संता बोला- लो बताओ, कितनी लम्बी उम्र है!
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बंता (संता से)-मैंने शन्नो से वादा किया था कि मैं उसके लिए कोई भी तकलीफ सह सकता हूं, यहां तक कि नरक की यातनाएं भी झेल सकता हूं।
संता (बंता से)- तो फिर, तुमने वो वादा निभाया।
बंता- हां, मैंने उससे शादी जो कर ली।
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संता: अगर सरकार ताजमहल के अन्दर पान और गुटखा खाने कि अनुमति दे दे तो। बंता: कसम से ये गुटखा खाने वाले ताजमहल को लालक़िला बना देंगे।
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Teacher-Baccho Kabir, Rahim, Mira ka
Koi doha sunao.
Student-Ganga ke ghat pe ghtna ghti
Gambhir, Rahim liye Mira ki pappi or
Pakde gye Kabir.
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Kaha kho gaye hai aap,
Ya so gaye hai aap,
Bewafa to lagte nahi the pehle,
Kya ab ho gaye hai aap !!
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Teacher: Jawani aur
Budhape me farak batao?
Student: Jawani me mobile me “HASEENO”
k numbers hote hai,
Aur Budhape me “HAKEEMO” ke..!
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May this festival of colours bring a smile to ur lips, a twinkle in ur eyes and a cheer in ur voice. Have a colourful Holi!
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Me ja ja jovu hu,
Mane tharo chahero dikhto hai,
Ii thaaro kusur nathi,
Salo sab chahero aaj rangeelo hai,
Holi Mubarak!
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Bhagwan ko gussa kab
aata hai?
A. jab koi ladki shaadi se
pehle pregnant ho jaye,
aur uski maa
Kahe “hey bhagwan ye tune kya kiya”.
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College ka 1st Din,
Boy- Whts ur name?
Grl- Mujhe sab DIDI kahte hai.
Boy- Wow wht a co-incedence
Mujhe sab JIJAJI kehte hai.
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CM To Secratry - Jbse CM Bna Hu Meri Maa Ko Hichki Bahut Aati Hai,
Sectry - Wo To Aayegi Sir State Me Bijli Jate Hi Log Aapki Maa Ko Hi Yad Karte Hai..
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Ek zara si bhool khata ban gayi,
meri wafa hi meri saza ban gayi,
dil liya aur khel kar tod diya usne,
hamari jaan gayi aur unki adaa ban gayi.
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Why girls live longer than boys?.
Scientific studies have proved
that 'shopping' never causes HEART ATTACKS,
but 'saying the bills' does!
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My life won't be interesting if you're not interested in me.
Be my Valentine!
VALENTINES
Issued in Public Interest by Wives:
On this Valentine's Day, resolve to save nature.
Avoid roses, gift only diamonds.
Happy Valentine's Day!
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You're a
V: Vivacious
A: Alluring
L: Likeable
E: Enigmatic
N: Nice
T: Tranquil
I: Incredible
N: Natural and
E: Enchanting person.
I would love to have you as the Valentine of my life!
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Getting
L: Love
O: Of your
V: Valentine till
E: Eternity is heavenly.
Thanks for being my Heaven on Earth!
Happy Valentine's Day!
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No poems no fancy words
I just want the world to know
that I LOVE YOU my Princess with all my heart.
Happy Valentines Day.
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New style of prpose girl!
Dekh me nhi chahta ki mera ldka bda hokr teri ldki ko chede,mujhe bura lgega
Grl- To
Boy-Tu ha bol dono ko bhai-behan bna denge.
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Apno Ko Yaad Karna Pyaar Hai,
Gairo Ka Sath Dena Sanskar Hai,
Dusmno Ko Mafe Karna Upkar Hai
Aur Dost Ko Paresan Karna Hamara Jannm Siddh Adhikar Hai......
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Best Ads:
Forest Dept:
Shoot Birds with Camera
Not With Gun..
Latest:
Fly with KINGFISHER
Not on PLANE
But with BEER!
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SHRABI:"Agar mere hath me SARKAR ho to me DESH ki takdir
badal dunga..
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WIFE:"-pehle apna pajama to badal le, subah se
meri SALVAR pehan k ghum raha hai..:
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Mausam Ye Haseen Kehta Hai Pyar Karle Dil Diwana Kehta Hai Ikrar Karle.
Chahat Kehti Hai Izhar Karle.
Par Mummy Kehti Hai Pehle Graduation Tu Pass Karle..?
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Attitude Of Girls :
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Jab Ladke Nahi Dekhein To:
Girl : Kutta, Dekhta Bhi Nahi..!!
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Jab Ladke Dekhein To
Girl: Dekh Kaise Kutte Ki Tarah Dekh Raha Hai..!!
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Rajnikant ne Robot film kyu
banayi..?
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Kyuki wo dikhana chahta tha ke
aurat sirf aadmi ka hi nahi,
machine ka bhi dimag kharab kar
sakti hai...
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Mera har pal aaj khoobsurat hain,
Dil mein jo sirf teri hi soorat hain,
Kuch bhi kahe ye duniya gum nahi
Duniya se jyada hume teri jarurat h
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Agar Duniya mey kuch kar dikhaana hain
toh sunn meri baat..
Haathi ke upar ulta khada
hokar Photo Khichva,
Ab photo ko ulta karke
duniya ko dikha...
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Ladki ek aisi paheli hai, kabhi teri to kabhi meri saheli hai.
Kharcha karo to bole "darling, how are you?".
Na karo to bole "brother, who are you?".
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To sweet friend,
I send Happy Makar Sankranti
Wishes for you with love.
I hope this harvest is the
Best in the whole year and you
Have lots of grains to earn profits.
Happy Makar Sankranti Friends
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What Is That Bright Light?
From Where Does This Fragrance
Coming? This Gentle Breeze,
Cool Air Hearty Music,
Oh! Its Sankranthi, Wish You A
Very Happy Makar Sankranti.
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Suraj Ki Rashi Badlegi, Kuch
Ka Naseeb Badlega, Ye Saal
Ka Pehla Parv Hoga Jab Hum
Sab Mil Khushiya Manayege.
Happy Makar Sakranti Friends.
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Bhula Ke Mujhko Agar Tum Bhi Ho Salamat
To Bhula Ke Tujhko, Sambhalna Mujhe Bhi Aata Hai
Nahi Hai Meri Fitrat Mein Ye Aadat Warna
Teri Tarah Badalna Mujhe Bhi Aata Hai.
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Raho meri zulfon ki parchhayi mein
Aur toot kar mujhko pyaar karo….
Aaj mai mai na rahu, aj mai “tum” ho jau
Apne pyaar se aisa mera shringaar karo
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There was once a wife so jealous that when her husband came home one night and she couldn't find hairs on his jackets she yelled at him, "Great, so now you're cheating on me with a bald woman!"
The next night, when she didn't smell any perfume, she yelled again by saying, "She's not only bald, but she's too cheap to buy any perfume!"
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Tanhaayi Mere Dil Mein Samaati Chali Gayi,
Kismat Bhi Apna khel Dikhaati Chali Gayi,
Mehki Fizaa Mein Dekha Jo pyaar ko,
Bus Yaad Kisi ki Aayi Aur Rulaati Chali Gayi..
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Ek murgi aur uske teen bache road cross kar rahe the. Road cross karne ke baad murgi ke ek bache ne kaha, “Aakhir hum paanchon ne road cross karliya”.
Paanch kaise?
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Socho Socho …
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Kaise Hua?
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Aur Jara Socho
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Are bacha hai, kuchh bhi bol sakta hai.
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