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SWARG NARK

Wats SWARG?
American Salary, British Home, Chinise Food & Indian Wife.

Wats NARK?
American Wife, Britis Food, Chinise Home & Indian sal 

May,12 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Rishtedar Banni Ki Koshish

Dost : kaisa hai? 
Me : Bas theek
Dost : aur padhai kaisi chalri hai? 
Me : dost hai dost reh bhenchodd.. rishtedar banni ki koshish na kar..!!

May,11 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dil Mei Chhed

Doctor- Aapki wife k dil me chhed hai...
.
Husband-Kis chutiye ne is lavde ko doctor bnaya...abe use dil nhi choot kehte hai..!!

May,11 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Urine During Dinner

How to tell your girlfriend if you are going to urine during dinner? Dear, I've to shake hands with a close friend whom I am going to introduce you later.

May,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Music Lover

Who is a true music lover? Ans: a girl is singing in a bathroom while taking bath and a boy near the keyhole is using his ears and not his eyes.

May,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Dress And Undress

There are two things men really like women to do in hurry. Dress and undress.

May,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Sandwich Loge

A girl selling SANDWICH on the beach in goa asked a 
Boy:sandwich loge? 
Boy replied o kamliye sand wich kyon? room wich kyon 
nahi?

May,8 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Hath Mein Barkat

Kehte hai aurat ke haath mein barkat hoti hai , bilkul sahi hai 
3 inch ka haath main do to 8 inch ka karke deti hai 

May,8 2015
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Ladki Ke Saath Romantic Film

Agar Kabhi Unke Sath Film Jane Ka Mauka Mile To Koi Romantic Film Hi Dekhne Jaye, Unke Sath Romantic Film Dekhi Matlab Ladki Patti.

May,7 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Bina NIRODH

Woh raat Diwali wali thi, 
woh piya se chudne wali thi, 
Koi aur hi aake chod gaya, 
Lund ko lehnge se ponch gaya, 
Uski Maa ne kiya VIRODH, 
Tune choda bina NIRODH. 

May,5 2015
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MATHs To A Girl

How do u teach MATHs to a girl? 

Add her to the bed, substract her clothes, divide her legs & 

May,5 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Nice
Lips are like FRIENDS.. if we say READ, WRITE, LEARN, they will never meet.. but if we say BUNK, PLAY, PARTY, PICNIC, fatafat mil jaate hai
May,5 2015
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Aapkichut aur Sabkichut
One hakla went for interview & was asked to say - Institute,Obstitute & Substitute. Hakla said: Inkichut, Aapkichut aur Sabkichut !!
May,5 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
MAWA
Sardar used to fuck sardarNi using milk as lubricant. Later she was rushed to hospital, when the Doctar came Out of O.T. said, no baby or baba, just 1kg MAWA.
May,5 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
हमारा फ़र्ज़ बनता है

पप्पू ने बस स्टॉप पर खड़ी एक लड़की को आँख मारी। 
लड़की: मैं ऐसी वैसी लड़की नहीं हूँ।
पप्पू: वो तो ठीक है मगर चेक करना हमारा फ़र्ज़ बनता है।

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
पडोसी की बीवी!
एक बार सिंधी की बीवी अपने घर पर नहा रही थी तो पठान ने चुपके से उसे देख लिया।

अगले दिन सिंधी जब पठान से मिला तो पठान बोला, "मैंने कल तुम्हारी बेगम को नहाते हुए देखा।"

सिंधी को यह सुन बहुत गुस्सा आया और उसने भी बदला लेने की ठान ली।

शाम को सिंधी ने देखा कि पठान के कमरे के परदे उठे हुए हैं और कमरे में सेक्स हो रहा था।

अगले दिन सिंधी पठान से बोला, "तुमने तो मेरी बीवी को नहाते हुए देखा था ना, मैंने तो कल तुम दोनों को सेक्स करते देखा।"

पठान हँसते हँसते बोला, "चल साले झूठे, कल रात को तो मैं घर पर ही नहीं था।"
May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
ro na sake

bikhri ankhon se moti hum piro na sake teri yaad me sari raat so na sake
beh na jaye ansuon me tasvir ye soch kar
hum ro na sake

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
I Am Cold

I just want somebody, who kisses me in the rain, holds me tight when I’m sad, and wraps their arms around me when I’m cold.

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Khamosh aankho se

Jab khamosh aankho se baat hoti hai.
Aise hi mohabbat ki shurwat hoti hai.
Tumhare hi khyalo mein khoye rehte hai.
Pata nahi kab din kab raat hoti hai ?

May,4 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
In real life

4 bottle vodka
kaam mera rozka....
In real life :
Mom:- Vella baitha hai mutter hi cheel de

May,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Majboori

What was the nick name of Mahatma Gandhi.??
Alia Bhatt: Majboori.

May,2 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Baap Usko Jyotishi

Beta 5000 Kama Ke Laya To Baap Usko Jyotishi Ke Pasd Le Gya,
Aaapne To Kaha Tha Yeh Kuch Nahi Kamayega?
Jyotishi: Bhaisab, Maine Iska Hath Dekha Tha, G**nd Nahi

Apr,30 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Baap Usko Jyotishi

Beta 5000 Kama Ke Laya To Baap Usko Jyotishi Ke Pasd Le Gya,
Aaapne To Kaha Tha Yeh Kuch Nahi Kamayega?
Jyotishi: Bhaisab, Maine Iska Hath Dekha Tha, G**nd Nahi

Apr,30 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Pass chhodu

Soch raha hu ki daru chhod du…

Par

?

Kiske pass chhodu..
Sabhi dost to kamine hai mere..
New year ke pehle hi pee jayenge

Apr,29 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
गर्लफ्रेंड का स्तन

मित्र का मन और गर्लफ्रेंड का स्तन हमेशा बड़ा होना चाहिए।

Apr,28 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Saza Ban Jaye

Kisi Ka Anjane Mein Bhi Dil Mat Dukhana
Ho Sakta Hai Ki,
Us Ki Aankh Se Gira Ek Bhi Aansu Tumhari 
Zindgi K Liye Saza Ban Jaye..

Apr,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
It takes 2 to tango

It takes 2 to tango,
2 to kiss,
2 to talk and remenisce.
So many good things cum in 2
and one of those things is me and u!

Apr,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Moment with u

I have liked many but loved very few.
Yet no-one has been as sweet as u.
I’d stand and wait in the worlds longest queue.
just for the pleasure of a moment with u.

Apr,27 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Don’t Mind

Kapil Sharma: Arey yaar yeh Gandhi ji har note par hanste kyon rahte hai?

Gutthi: Simple hai, wo royenge toh note geela ho jayega na …..ha ha.. Don’t Mind




Apr,22 2015
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Diamond Ring

Wife: "In my dream, I saw you in a jewelry store and you bought me a diamond ring."
Husband: "I had the same dream and I saw your dad paying the bill."

Apr,14 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
bright

May you come up as bright as sun,
As cool as water and as sweet as honey.
Hope this Baisakhi fulfill all your desires and wishes.
Happy Baisakhi!!

Apr,13 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Ayurvedic Cigarette

Ab Yeh afwaah kisne failaayi…........Ki…........Patanjali ki Shop bar kal se Ayurvedic Cigarette milegi..!!

Apr,13 2015
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Prabhu ki maya

Prabhu
Yeh kya Moh-Maya hai?

Apna Baccha roye, toh dil me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ka roye, toh sir me!

Apni Biwi roye, toh sir me dard hota hai.
Aur doosre ki roye, toh dil me!

Sab prabhu ki maya hai

Apr,10 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
China mobile use karne wale

30000 ka phone lete ho lekin ek call to kya misscall karne ke liye bhi balance nahi hota??
China mobile use karne wale bhi kahenge ki Aap Chutiye Hain

Apr,9 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Sexy Secretary

Peter: "Your secretary is very sexy..." Tony: "Thanks! It's a robot actually, named 'Maria'. If you squeeze her right boob, she takes dictation & if you squeeze her left boob, she types letters! I'll Lend it to you for a day & you can see her functions..." Next day Peter called Tony from hospital & shouted: "You bastard!" You didn't tell me that the "HOLE" between Maria's legs is a pencil sharpener.

Apr,9 2015
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तुम जानते हो

पठान: यार, तुम जानते हो, मैंने तीन शादियाँ की, पर तीनों बीवियां मर गई। समझ में नहीं आता कि मैं क्या करूं?
सिंधी: बस अब औरत जात पर रहम कर।

Apr,4 2015
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भाभी जी

एक महिला ने एक घोड़े के लिंग को छु लिया।
घोड़ा उत्साहित होकर कूदने लगा और बहुत तेज़ भागने लगा।
घोड़े का मालिक बोला, "भाभी जी अब हमारा भी पकड़ो, हमको घोड़ा पकड़ना है"।

Apr,4 2015
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अमीर आदमी

अमीर आदमी गरीब आदमी से सेक्स मेहनत है या मजा!
गरीब आदमी मजा ही होगा! मेहनत होती तो आप हमसे ही करवाते!

Apr,4 2015
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Alia Bhatt On India’s Win

Isi beech Alia Bhatt ne David Dhawan ko unke bete Shikhar dhawan ke shatak maarne par badhai di.

Yeh Sunkar David Dhawan phone par hi behosh ho gaye!! :-D

Apr,4 2015
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मरीज - डॉक्टर

एक मरीज डॉक्टर के पास गया।
मरीज-डॉक्टर साहब मेरे कान में मटर का पौधा उग आया है।
डॉक्टर- यह तो बड़ी हैरानी की बात है!
मरीज-जी हां डॉक्टर साहब हैरानी की बात तो है ही क्योंकि मैंने तो अपने कान में भिन्डी के बीज डाले थे!!

Apr,3 2015
Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak Hansimazak
Fake ID


फेसबूक पे लड़की की फेक आई चलानेवालों
लड़की तो तुम बन गये
लेकिन अफसोस
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तुम कभी माँ नहीं बन पाओगे

Apr,3 2015
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