Santa dialled a phone number.
A computerizd female voice said,
Apke paas paryapt balance nahi hai, Kipaya appna mobile rechage kare.
Santa: bas janeman tumse baat ho jati hai, itna hi kaafi hai.
BF Ne GF Ki SaHeli Ki SHaaN Me Arz Kia,
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai,
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai,
Meri ManZiL Tu NaHi,
Teri SaHeLi Hai.
Suhagrat ko pati ne patni se pucha kya mehsus kar rahi ho?
Patni: aaj tak topup me kam chalate the aaj se life time karwa liya.
Dosti Pe Ek Pyar Bhari Shayari,
Shikwa Naa Kar Dost,
Gila Na Kar Yaar,
Bas Itni Si Guzarish Hai Meri.
Jab Main Tere Me Daalu,
Tu Hilla Naa Kar Yaar.
Office Building Should Face North, North-East Or North
West Direction As It Brings Good Luck And positive Energy.
Plz froward to all ur friends girl: When someone is Flirting with u,
Please Co operate.
Yahi to din hain,
Kuch saal baad toh koi ghaas bhi nai dalega.
Santa went to school for getting the report card of his son.
Santa: Madam report kab dengi aap.
Teacher: Period khatam hone tak to intezzar karo.
Kaho Santa ji suhaag raat kaisi rahi?
Kuch mat pooocho yaar,
Pehle 5,6 baar to missed call lagi aur,
Jab sahi number laga to balance nil ho gya.
She: Hello baby, tumhari yaad aa rahi thi.
He: Abhi salary nahi aayi hai meri.
She: Acha chalo papa aa gaye, bye.
Har Panty Ki Khushbhu Ka Ek Raaz Hota Hai,
Ladki Ki Bra Ko Utarne Ka Ek Andaaz Hota Hai,
Jab Tak Thokar Na Lage Kisi Ke Lund Ki,
Har Ladki Ko Apni Choot Par Naaz Hota Hai.
Sardar: Will u marry me?
Girl: Sorry im a lesbian.
Sardar: what is a lesbian?
Girl: I like to have sex with girls.
Sardar: Wow im also a lesbian.
Love hurts when you breakup with someone.
Hurts even more when someone breaks up with you,
But love hurts the most,
When the person you love,
Has no idea how you feel.
Love hurts when you breakup with someone.
Hurts even more when someone breaks up with you,
But love hurts the most,
When the person you love,
Has no idea how you feel.
Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something,
And sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.
K.G. Boy: Mam may I go to toilet?
Mam: No, A to Z sunao fir jana.
Boy: ABCDEFGHIJKLMN_ _QRS_UVWX_Z.
Mam: P,O,T,Y kaha hai.
Boy: Meri chaddi mein.
Ladkon ko hasmukh ladkiyan badi pasand aati hain. Tum uske ghatiya se ghatiya baat par bhi zor-zor se haso
Wo bahut khush ho jayega aur tumhe chahne lagega.
Tum jis ladke ko chahti ho uske doston ke saath thodi flirtingkiya karo.
Tum jise chahti ho use bilkul bhav mat do. Wo jalan se aag-baboola ho jayega.
Tumhare prem mein wo joru ka ghulam ban jayega.
Kissing ke Douran Saans Lete Rahe
Kissing ke Douran Dusri aur Dhyan Na De
Kissing ke Duran Expressive Rahe
Partner ki Pasand ka Khayal Rakhe
The doctor told a patient that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. After 300 days
The patient called the doctor to report he had lost weight, but he had a problem.Doctor
Ek Ladki Ka Dusri Baar Balaatkaar Ho Gaya Rote Hue Usne Apni Maa Ko Bataya.
Maa Boli: Betu Maine Tujse Kha Bhi Tha Ke Aage Se Dhyaan Rakhna.
Beti Boli: Maa Maine Aage Se Pura Dhyaan Rakha Par Kya Karoo Usne Meri Piche Se Gaand Maar Li.
Duniya Kahti Hai Ki Har Successful Aadmi,
Ke Pichhe Aurat Ka Haath Hota Hai.
Par Kisi Ko Ye Nahi Pata,
Ki Us Aurat Ke Haath Mein Danda Hota Hai,
Aur Wo Danda Admi Ki Gaand Mein Hota Hai.
Tumhari patni ka bhai lagta tumhara saala hai.
Wah Wah.
Tumhari patni ka bhai lagta tumhara sala hai.
Arey bhai, aage bhi to bolo.
Daya says: Abhijeet mujhe to lagta jaroor daal mein kuch kala hai.
SANTA: Bhiga sa lagta h Alam mujhe,
Bhigi si lagti h subah mujhe,
Bhiga lag raha h sara jaha mujhe.
BANTA: Uth sale,bistar pr susu kr dia h tune.
Kashti toofan se nikal sakti hai,
Taqdeer kisi bhi waqt bhi badal sakti hai,
Hausla rakh, channel na badal,
SANIA MIRZA kisi bhi waqt Jhuk sakti hai.
Santa ne Banta se kha Duniya
Ke do sabse bade ghatak aur
khtarnak hathiyar ka nam likho
Banta ne likha
Bibi ke Ansu aur padosan ki smile
Attitude plays a key role in your interview success. There is a fine balance between confidence, professionalism and modesty.
Ranveer Singh, original name, Ranveer Singh Bhavnani is actually Sonam Kapoor's cousin.
Rah chalti ladki ko dekh kar ladka shayari ke andaz mein bola,
Ladka: Kash main tumhare hasen honton ki lip-stick hota,
Ladki Ne huste hue jawab diye,
Ladki: Shukar karo nahi ho warna roz kisi ke lu*d pe lage hotey.
Wife: Phone pe itni dheemi awaaz mein kis se baat kar rahe ho?
Husband: Bahen hai.
Wife: To fir itni dhimi aawaz me kis liye?
Husband: Teri hai, isiliye.
Yeh ladkiya chahe kitna bhi
Salman Khan, Virat Kohli pe marti ho..
Ant mein
Inki shaadi…
Jethalal se hi honi hai!
पप्पू : पिछले हफ्ते मेरी और मेरी गर्लफ्रेंड की लड़ाई
हो गयी , और फिर हम अलग हो गए
गोलू : फिर ?
पप्पू : उसने मुझे चिढ़ाने के लिए अपने नए बॉयफ्रेंड के
साथ फोटो खिंचवा कर मुझे भेज दी ..
गोलू : ओह , ये तो बहुत बुरा किया उसने !!
पप्पू : तो में भी कौनसा कम हूँ ,
उसकी वही फोटो उसके बाप को भेज दी … :-कमीनी बहुत पीटी ओर अपने कलेजे मे ठंडक आगई
Wife: Shadi Ke Certificate Mein Kya Dhundh Rahe Ho?
Husband: Expiry Date.
Tell me about yourself.
Why should I hire you?
What are your career options right now?
Why have you had so many jobs?
God ne Imran hasmi se pucha agle janam me kya banna pasand karoge?
Imran hasmi= rawan.
God=wo Q?
Imran_hasmi=1 mu se kiss kar kar ke thak gaya hu..
Ek Bas Nahar Me Gir Gayi.
Police – Bas Kaise Giri.
Driver – Mujhe Nahi Pata.
Police – Kya?
Driver – Wo Aaj Conductor Nahi Aaya To Mai Piche Kiraya Lene Gaya Hua Tha.
एक महीने से घर से गायब एक हरयाणवी पति घर लौटा.
पत्नी – मैं थारे ग़म में बीमार पड़ी थी … जे मैं मर जाती तो ?
पति – तो मैं कोण सा शमशान की चाबी अपने साथ ले गया था …
Kadmo ki duri se dilo ke fasle nhi badte,
Dur hone se ehsas nhi marte,
Kuch kadmo ka fasla hi sahi hamarebeech,
Lekin aisa koi pal nhi jab hum apko yad nhi krte..
Aise Hi Rakhna Mujhko Eh Mere Khuda,
Meri Dosti Sada Aise Hi Paak Rahe,
Sagar Mar Bhi Jaaye Koi Gham Na Ho,
Marne Ke Baad Sada Doston Ko Yaad Rakhe…
मैं अपनी सरकार का बहुत शुक्रगुज़ार हूँ जिनकी वजह से मैं टूटी हुई सड़कों पर टू-व्हीलर चलाती हुई लड़कियों के उछलते हुए उभार देख पाता हूँ।