Raj Kapoor Mera Naam Joker was the first Hindi movie ,
To have not one but two intervals.

College ke first day;
Ladka: Tumhara naam kya hai?
Ladki: Mujhe sab didi kehte hai..
Ladka: WOW MUJHE SAB JIJAJI KEHTE HAIN!

Wife: Mujhe kahi mehngi jagah ghumne le chalo.
Kapil: Chalo tyaar ho jayo petro pump chalte hai.

Teacher Pappu Se Tang Aake Ek Din Usko Class Mein Khada Karva Ke Boli.
Teacher: Pappu Tum Bahut Badtameez Hote Ja Rahe Ho, Batao Kya Saja Dun Tumhein?
Pappu Piche Ki Taraf Dekh Kar Teacher Se Bola.
Pappu: Mam, Wo Ladki Jo 2nd Last Seat Pe Bethi Hai Na, Uske Sath Bathroom Mein Band Kar Do.

Tera Intezaar Mujhe Har Pal Rehta Hai,
Har Lamha Mujhe Tera Ehsaas Rehta Hai,
Tujh Bin Dhadkane Rukk Si Jaati Hai,
Ki Tu Mere Dil Me Meri Dhadkan Banke Rehta Hai.

Larka: Aik larki ko cherte huwe kahta hai k Jan E Man is dil mai a jao.
Larki: Sandil utaroo kia?
Larka: Jan E Man ye dil hai koi masjid nahi sandil pahan kar hi ajao.

Avoid the A frame while kissing. Even if you are kissing her with great technique a girl will not enjoy it as much if your hips are miles apart. Stand close to her even if it is your first kiss.

Ek aadmi ek khatarnaak Sherni khareed kar ghar le aaya.
Padosiyon ne poochha: Bhaai ye sherni kyon le aaye?
Aadmi ne udaas swar me bataaya: LAST MONTH meri WIFE gujar gai naa,
Toh ab uske bina ghar badaa soona soona lagta hai mujhe.

Of all the vids I’ve ever viewed, I’ve never viewed a vid as valued as Alex’s engVid vid.

Anjaan Ki Tarah Mile Aur Ulfat Ho Gayi
Ajnabi Dost Aise Mile Ki Dosti Ho Gayi
Sacchi Dosti Ka Irada Tha Unse,
Par Hume Unse Sachi Mohabbat Ho Gyi.

Hazaroon Bachiyan Aisi K Har Bachi Pe Dam Niklay.
Par Jis Bachi Pe Dam Niklay Woe Ghar Se Kam Niklay.

During the making of Sholay, Dharmendra paid the light boys to make mistakes during shots, so that he could embrace Hema Malini again and again.

Santa dialled a phone number.
A computerizd female voice said,
Apke paas paryapt balance nahi hai, Kipaya appna mobile rechage kare.
Santa: bas janeman tumse baat ho jati hai, itna hi kaafi hai.

BF Ne GF Ki SaHeli Ki SHaaN Me Arz Kia,
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai,
Tu SaWaL NaHi Ek PaHeLi Hai,
Meri ManZiL Tu NaHi,
Teri SaHeLi Hai.

Plz froward to all ur friends girl: When someone is Flirting with u,
Please Co operate.
Yahi to din hain,
Kuch saal baad toh koi ghaas bhi nai dalega.

She: Hello baby, tumhari yaad aa rahi thi.
He: Abhi salary nahi aayi hai meri.
She: Acha chalo papa aa gaye, bye.

Love hurts when you breakup with someone.
Hurts even more when someone breaks up with you,
But love hurts the most,
When the person you love,
Has no idea how you feel.

Sometimes one creates a dynamic impression by saying something,
And sometimes one creates as significant an impression by remaining silent.
Be kind whenever possible. It is always possible.
Happiness is not something ready made. It comes from your own actions.
If you can, help others; if you cannot do that, at least do not harm them.

Ladkon ko hasmukh ladkiyan badi pasand aati hain. Tum uske ghatiya se ghatiya baat par bhi zor-zor se haso
Wo bahut khush ho jayega aur tumhe chahne lagega.
Tum jis ladke ko chahti ho uske doston ke saath thodi flirtingkiya karo.
Tum jise chahti ho use bilkul bhav mat do. Wo jalan se aag-baboola ho jayega.
Tumhare prem mein wo joru ka ghulam ban jayega.

The doctor told a patient that if he ran eight kilometers a day for 300 days, he would loose 34 kilos. After 300 days
The patient called the doctor to report he had lost weight, but he had a problem.Doctor

Ek Ladki Ka Dusri Baar Balaatkaar Ho Gaya Rote Hue Usne Apni Maa Ko Bataya.
Maa Boli: Betu Maine Tujse Kha Bhi Tha Ke Aage Se Dhyaan Rakhna.
Beti Boli: Maa Maine Aage Se Pura Dhyaan Rakha Par Kya Karoo Usne Meri Piche Se Gaand Maar Li.

SANTA: Bhiga sa lagta h Alam mujhe,
Bhigi si lagti h subah mujhe,
Bhiga lag raha h sara jaha mujhe.
BANTA: Uth sale,bistar pr susu kr dia h tune.

Ranveer Singh, original name, Ranveer Singh Bhavnani is actually Sonam Kapoor's cousin.