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Ek Ladki Apni Kutiya Se Puchhti Hai..
Tumhare Itne Sare Bachhe Kyu Hote Hain.
Kutiya: Behan Kapde Utar Kar.
Road Pe Ghumo, Pata Chal Jayega.
48
Santa: Jab Mai Mar Jaun To
Samne Wali Family Ko Zaroor Bulana.
Banta: Kyun,
Santa: Yaar Unke Ghar Ki Ladies
Murde Se Lipat Lipat Kar Roti Hain.
54
Ajib Hai Nakhre Tere,
Ajib Hai Tera Style.
Naak Pochhne Ki Tameez Nahin Aur Haath Mein Hai Mobile Tere.
43
संता पहली बार बार में गया और काउंटर के पास खड़ा हो गया।
वहां खड़े एक व्यक्ति ने कहा, 'पीटर स्कॉच, सिंगल।'
तभी वहीं खड़े दूसरे आदमी ने कहा, 'जॉनी वॉकर, सिंगल।'
शादीशुदा संता ने एक पल सोचा और काउंटर पर खड़े होकर कहा, 'संता सिंह, मैरिड।
55
Zindagi K Her Mor Pe Sunheri Yadoon Ka Ehsas Rehney Do,
Suror Dil Mai Aur Zuban Pe Mithas Rehney Do,
Yehi Falsafa Hai Jeeney Ka,
Na Raho Udaas, Na kisi Ko Udaas Rehnay Do.
925
Suhag Raat Pe Dulhe Ne Dulhan Ki Ankh Ko Chuma
Dulhan : Ye Kya
Dulha :Ankh Zindgi Ki Kitab Hai
Dulhan :Niche Library Me Aag Lagi Hae, Tu Kitaab Me Ghusa Hai .
447
Sir: Pani Mai Rahene Wale 5 Jaanwar Ke Naam Btao?
Kapil: Mendhak
Sir: Good Kapil. 4 Aur Btao ?
Kapil: Uski Mummy Uske papa Uski Bahen Aur Uski Item.
472
Mai Aur Meri Friend Aaj Pani Puri Khayenge
Wah wah
Mai Aur Meri Friend Aaj Pani Puri Khayenge
ACP says Daya
Hum New Year Me Line Marne Kaha Jayenge
55
Dr. Ambedkar Just used lamp to study.
Kalaam used candle to study.
Bush studied in streetlight.
But Do u knw about Me?
Only Agarbatti Bhagwan Bharose.
867
Me: Mom Earthquake Aaya Hai
Mom: Vo Theek Hai Par Tune Apna Room Saaf Kia ?
Me: No
Mom: Throws Chappal With The Magnitude of 7.7
And Said This is Earthquake .
35
India has the largest number of Post Offices in the world.
749
Heart attacks are more likely to happen on a Monday.
951
Hari Thi Man Bhari Thi,
No Laakh Motiyon Sey Jadi Thi,
Raja Ji Key Khet Mein,
Duata Odhey Khadi Thi.
Ans: Bhutta.
948
Tuje paane ke liye kuch bhi kar sakta hu,
Tere pyar mein jee mar sakta hu,
Firbi agar tu naa mila,
To Ye formula dusre pe try kar sakta hu.
59
Copy only active window to clipboard Normally,
The Print Screen key copies the entire display or two displays if you got them,
ALT + Print Screen only copies the currently active window to the clipboard.
Whether taking a screenshot to diagnose a problem,
Or just because you want to show something to a friend, this will come in handy.
888
Jabbhi app apni dream girl se mile toh apke chehre par smile honi chahia.
Isse wo bhi apko smile degi wo ki apka confert level ko,
Badayega isse app uske orh jayada karib aoge.
854
Pati sex karte hue bola:ladka nikalu ya ladki?
Patni: tumhari ma ka bhosda,dard se meri gaand fati ja rahi hai.
Pahle jo dala hai vo to nikalo.
50
Girl to baba: Baba yeh LUND kaisa hota hai?
Baba: Koi Chota, Koi Lamba, Koi Mota,
Koi Patla, Koi Sakht or Koi Narm.
Girl: Baba Lagta hai sari umar gand marwate rahe ho.
41
Santa ek din ek nurse ke saath sex kar raha tha.
Nurse chillai ki dard ho raha hai.
Santa: Sali, khud wahan injection lagati hai jahan soorakh hi nahi hai,
Aur tujhe soorakh mein dard ho raha hai.
48
Lover: Darling Tum Chaddi kyon nahi pahenti?
Lady: Mere husband ko maine VACHAN de rakha hai ki,
Usske alawa kisi ke bhi samne Chaddi nahi utaarungi.
36
Zindagi wo jo guzar jaye,
Ansoo wo jo beh jaye,
Khusi wo jo mil jaye,
Gam wo jo beet jaye,
Magar DOST Wo jo HUMESHA sath nibhaye.
557
Girl: If you will try to kiss me main shor macha dungi.
Boy: Lekin yahan to dur tak koi nahi hai.
Girl: I know per formality to karni hi padegi.
740
May your birthday and every day be filled with the warmth of sunshine,
The happiness of smiles, the sounds of laughter,
The feeling of love and the sharing of good cheer.
857
Jeene Ki Khwaish Me Har Roz Marte Hai,
Wo Aaye Na Aaye Hum Intezaar Karte Hai,
Jutha Hi Sahi Mere Yaar Ka Vaada Hai,
Hum Sach Maankar Aitbar Karte Hai.
493
Santa: Oye banta machli khayega?
Banta: Nhi yaar usme kaante hote hain.
Santa: Oye chadd yaar chappal pahen ke kha lena.
995
Banta: Oye Ye Kya Ho Gaya Tujhe.
Santa Rote Hue: Kuch Nahi Yaar Padosan Ki Billi Mere Murge Ko Khane Ke Liye Uske Piche Padi Rahti Thi.
Banta: To?
Santa: Maine Uske Pati Ko Angrezi Mein Bol Ke Samjhaya To Usne Peet Peet Kar Meri Ye Halat Kar Di.
Banta Hairani Se: Abe Esa Kya Bola Tha Tune.
Santa: Keep An Eye On Your Wife’s Pussy, She Is After My Cock.
495
सनी लीओन की लोकप्रियता देख,भारत सरकार ने Postal Stamp बनवाए.
Stamp की खपत इतनी बढी कि सनी भी खुश और भारत सरकार भी खुश.
फिर कहीं से शिकायतें आनी शुरू हुई के भैया STAMP तो चिपकता ही नहीं.
सरकार ने एक कमीशन का गठन किया और जाँच के आदेश दे दिये.
आधे घंटे में ही जाँच की रिपोर्ट आ गई कि STAMP तो बिल्कुल सही है.
लोग चाटते गलत Side से है.
51
Pyar aur maut se darta kaun hai,
Pyar to ho jata he ise krta kaun hai,
Hum to kar de pyar me jaan bhi qurban,
Par pata to chale hmse pyar karta kaun hai.
43
Aaj maza nahi aaya sukhhi bhel me.
Aaj maza nahi aaya sukhhi bhel me.
ACP to khooni: Ab puri zindagi sadte rehna jail me.
38
DIPAWALI Ka Yeh Pyara Tyohaar,
Jeewan Me Laye khusiya Apaar,
Laxmiji Viraje Aapke Dwar,
Subh kamna Hamari Kare Sweekar.
HAPPY DIWALI
507
SANTA Shirt utar ke balcony me tha.
Ek admi: Wah Santa ji Kya chest hai.
SANTA: Are ye to kuchh nahi,
Teri bhabhi ki dekhega to pagal ho jayega.
658
Har Dost se achi baat karna fitrat hai hamari,
Har dost khush rahe hasrat hai hamari,
Koi hum ko yad kare na kare,
Har dost ko yaad karna aadat hai hamari.
327
Ishq Ki Tammanna Hum Bhi Rakhte Hai,
Kisi K Dil Me Hum Bhi Dhadkte Hai,
Na Jaane Kab Milenge,
Jiske Liye Hum Tadpate Hai.
41
Santa asks Banta: Tujhe ladki fasani aati hai? Banta: Nahi. Santa: Nahi aati to seekh le. Pehle ek kaagaz ka jahaaz bana. Phir usey Class mein uda. Mam k puchne par, larki ka naam lagade. BAS FAS GAYI LADKI.
551
Girl: Bas Kro, Kisine Dekh Liya To.
Boy: Kuch Nahi Hoga Tum Bas Sidhi Raho,
Aur Pura Dikhao, Thoda Aur Karne Do,
Agar Nahi Dikhaya to Mein, Fail Ho Jauga.
48
Aapki hasi bahut pyaari lagti hai,
Aapki har khushi hamein hamari lagti hai,
Kabhi door na karna khud se humein,
Aapki dosti humein jaan se bhi pyaari lagti hai.
52
Faith is taking the first step even when you don't see the whole staircase.
427
Alia bhat: Safola oil to de diya bhaiya,
Iske sath ka Free Gift nahi diya.
Shopkeeper: Iske sath koyi gift nahi hai.
Alia: Ullu matt banao,
Isme likha hai Cholesterol Free.
294
In a examination hall,
A girl asks a boy sitting on d desknxt to her:
Mujhe is ans ki starting batade baaki main likh loongi.
Boy says: THE.
35
Patni: Aap bahut mote ho gaye ho.
Pati: Tum bhi to kitni moti ho gayi ho.
Patni: Main to maa banne wali hoon.
Pati: Main bhi to baap banne wala hoon.
535
382
एक लड़का गटर में गिर गया तभी एक लड़की की आवाज आई, सर्फ एक्सेल है ना, दाग अच्छे हैं।
लड़का गुस्से में: तेरी माँ का भोसड़ा, दाग इतने ही अच्छे हैं तो विसपर क्यों लगाती हो?
44
Condom chahiye kya?
Marwadi: kam bhav ka khushbudar rahega to de.
Salesman: Laude pe agarbatthi ka plastic lagake chod Bhosdike.
41
Mere Dil, Jiger, Kidney, Liver ho tum
waqt bewaqt aaye vo fever ho tum
Doob kar jisme marr jaoo vo River ho tum
Mere jeevan mein ab to forever ho tum.
721
Utar ke dekh meri chahat ki gehrai mein,
Sochna mere bare mein raat ki tanhai mein,
Agar ho jaye meri chahat ka ehsas tumhein,
To milega mera aks tumhein apni hi parchhai mein…
755
Alok nath: Sunny darling tumhe kam kapdo me dekh kar mere man me ek sawal khada hota he....
Sunny leone:Chup buddhe aj kal tere case me sirf sawal hi khada hota he..........
253
ABHEEJIT DAYA KO BOLA DEKH SARIKA KA FIGURE......
ABHEEJIT DAYA KO BOLA DEKH SARIKA KA FIGURE........
RAJNI BOLA DONT RUN AWAY I`LL PRESS D TRIGGER
YANNA RASCALA MIND IT!!!
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